bashster

I have to start my journal on a sad note with the demise of chomps NODDYMOBILE.On the way to work we were hit by a Mini cooper doing 60 miles an hour plus on a 40 road who decided to straight line a roundabout which means cut a lane out the lane me n chomps were in on the roundabout.The car did a 360 and the radiator sat 20yards down the road the bumper disappeared and we both sat there in shock.The car was a aboslute mess and thankfully we had a witness who blamed the womens erratic road usage and speed which is a relief.
Thankfully we both escaped with minor injuries and whiplash chomps went to a n e for the bump on her head and i have a nice impact wound to my leg.We both suffered whiplash and attend to sue for time off work for chomps she took the brunt of the impact.I kinda feel sad for the noddymobile chomps looked mortified to see her baby depart to the scrapyard.
She is only a week away from her test and this is the last thing she needed this week please gee her up and make her attack her test with gusto and not fear which must be coursing through her veins now!!!.
It makes you wonder if fate plays a hand when the log in pass chomps uses was changed to whiplash and the women she bumped into was called Warr the same name as the women giving her so much greif at work strange.
I have a lot of sympathy for all my chums having work problems this week rucks,lock,chomps are all having a rough time i hope they sort thir problems out i hate to see people so sad about something they have to do as a neccessatity to survive which sucks.
I have had a weird week where my naked ass has impressed on sg land plenty masking tape jokes but lots of positive comments too!!!.
My pool team played a blinder to actually start winning a few games only to be beaten 4 - 3 on the final shot of the final rack which was sickining.
I have also taken some serious piss take at work refernce a program called im a celebrity get me out of here in which b list celebs get dumped in a jungle and are forced to live primal and eat bugs inshit has challengers.
One such celeb is a bloke called David Guest who used to be married to Liza Minelli who they think i have a striking resembelance too!.Piccys are appearing all over the place at work thing is i don,t look that fat i think???.
Don,t get me wrong i have had some good times this week topped by a hilarious story told by a chap on jeremy vines radio 2 serious talk show heres a breakdown of what forced me n alfie to have to pull over to wipe tears of laughter from our eyes heres who the interview transpired.
Jeremy was talking about date rape drugging when a gent rang in saying when he was young he had visited a club and started chatting with some young gentleman because he liked not to feel lonely.He then went on to say how he only had two drinks the next thing he remembers is waking up with his trousers round his ankles and he had been ass raped.He then said he hadn,t the guts to tell his wife which made me laff so much im fuckin evil but it made me wonder what kind of club he had visited and why he found it ok to tell what 400000 people but not his wife very very shocking and very funny.
I also managed to get back into the the knack of being a king in the bedroom nuff said but hey the sight of a tattooed back and fantastic ass below you is a sight to behold whoooooo!.
Last night i continued the knack of talking in my sleep this time i was a mexican weatherman on a dodgy cable channel chomps says she thinks i spoke fluent mexican even thou i have never learnt the language in my life.
My dreams seem to be triggered off by images from tv late at night hence i have been THE HOFF,DARTH VADER and i think Shakira set the dream off last night strange.
I have listened some strange and wonderful tunes this week heres a top ten of bands and songs you shouldn,t not like whats yours????
DISCO-ODESSY (some dodgy 80,s disco song)
DADDY COOL-BONEY M(MY parents probably are to blame for that).
HELLO-LIONAL RITCHIE
BILLIE JEAN-THE JESUS JUICE KID
BECAUSE OF YOU-KELLY CLARKSON
I JUST WANT YOU TO KNOW-BACKSTREET BOYS
YMCA-VILLAGE PEOPLE
I WILL WALK 500 MILES-BY THE PROCLAIMERS
CRAZY IN LOVE-BEYONCE
AND one that fucks crissy off big time HOLLA BACK -Gwen Stefani she fuckin hates the b a ba ns bit which i think is cool lol.

Anyway im off to soak my battle car war wounds and hpefully purchase a boxing bag for peanuts wish me look.
WORDS OF THE WEEK FOR ME ARE
GAMMERROUGE-Blow jobs
TEACAKES!-shit or when something goes wrong
VOMMED-being sick
RUGMUNCHER-a women that bats from the other side
FROMBEE-Having a absolute fit!!!!

Sunday involves trip to see the DEATHDODGER my loft wall rock through the ages mureal which is starting to take shape.Atrip to pick up some ps2 games and boxing gloves if i get the bag.
Me n chomps will know devour duck pan cakes and chicken and cheesecake i think we need a pick me up.
Have fun kiddies this weekend and drive safely!!!