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b3autifulm3ss

Indiana

Member Since 2011

Followers 261 Following 252

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Thursday Jul 14, 2011

Jul 14, 2011
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So, to update on my fabulous life.

I am still talking to my ex, actually talked to him for about 3 hours last night/morning, and it ended up with the world "love" along with "I" and "you". You get the point, right?

Well, this is a little embarassing, but since I'm sharing, I might as well share it all. After 5 years of struggling to be with each other, he finally apologized for cheating on me the numerous times, oh, and the whole treating me like shit thing too. But, he told he I needed to come down and visit him so he could "fuck the shit out of me" (no pun intended).

We discussed so many things, but since we were being honest, and I was a little drunk, I just came out and asked if he ever thought we were going to get back together, or hoped, wished, etc. He said he still loves me, he misses me, and that he thinks about me 80% of the day (yes, we percentaged it) and that the only thing that ruined us was how serious I was all the time, and the fact that I couldn't take a joke. I have to be more witty, he told me.

How do you even become more witty? Why am I even bothering to ask that question? He should want to be with me, flaws and all, but we both know that it'll never work out, sad to say, but it's true. So why can't I just stop thinking about it, and talking to him? Either I'm pathetic, or I just care about him way too much. Either way, it's really getting on me nerves. After 5 years, and we're stil going through this shit, ya know?

Anyways, other than that monstrosity in my head, I'm hopefully getting myself a job soon. Filled out apps, turned in resumes, and going to check on them tomorrow! I miss working so much!!

Oh, and photo shoot Sunday for the "Knucklehead Knockouts" which is a small little corp on facebook, trying to get big, but hey, the more exposure, the better chances of me getting found, right?

I think I've spilled my guts enough for one blog. For now, sleep well, America.

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