OK so last night things progressed between Fancy Face and myself, no sex but let's just say I am finding it rather painful to sit down.
To be honest being intimate with someone who has no intention of having a relationship with me actually does my fucken head in although I know that if he did want more I would fucken freak out!! So I am fucked either way. This friends with benefits thing is not as easy as I thought it would be, why the hell am I so complicated, I just wish I could switch my anxiety off, it drives me nuts.
I can't go through another long length of time without sex again, fuck celibacy!! One of the reasons why Anton and myself didn't work is that I put so much pressure on the relationship being more serious than it needed to be I couldn't just relax and take it one day at a time. I need to strike a balance, just a little afraid of getting hurt by some one who I actually have fuck all in common with and who I know doesn't want more than to play with me albeit he is incredibly good looking and amazing with his hands.
WHAT FUCKEN NOW!!!
AAAAAAAARRRRRRGGGGGGHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
To be honest being intimate with someone who has no intention of having a relationship with me actually does my fucken head in although I know that if he did want more I would fucken freak out!! So I am fucked either way. This friends with benefits thing is not as easy as I thought it would be, why the hell am I so complicated, I just wish I could switch my anxiety off, it drives me nuts.
I can't go through another long length of time without sex again, fuck celibacy!! One of the reasons why Anton and myself didn't work is that I put so much pressure on the relationship being more serious than it needed to be I couldn't just relax and take it one day at a time. I need to strike a balance, just a little afraid of getting hurt by some one who I actually have fuck all in common with and who I know doesn't want more than to play with me albeit he is incredibly good looking and amazing with his hands.
WHAT FUCKEN NOW!!!
AAAAAAAARRRRRRGGGGGGHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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maby put a pillow under you butt