ayin

I am going to get organized. This has been the one thing that has stopped me from doing everything I wanted to in the past. First, I have to touch up my resume. Then I have to get through the play festival with out shrieking. EEEWWWW! What a fucking mess it has been for the past few weeks! Do you ever feel like you keep just missing people? Like, all my friends are back in town, and after the play festival is over I will finally have a chance to get up with them, but the weirdest shit keeps screwing things up. I need to learn how to relax, though, because it's being tense all the time that causes me to think things like, "I just keep missing oppurtunities to connect with people", and then they are nothing more than self fulling phrophecies . I have to get organized first, get all the last remaining school shit out of the way.
NOT BEING ORGANIZED = NO CONCENTRATION = FAIL/DO A HALF ASS JOB = I REALLY HATE MYSELF FOR FAILING BECAUSE I'M A PERFECTIONIST, AND I KNOW ITS MY RESPONSIBILTY = I ACT LIKE A CLOISTERED, TENSE, IMPATIENT, SELF OBSORBED, UNOBSERVANT PRICK. So, all I have to do is get organized and concentrate, and all the rest of that stuff will disapate. Also, smile more and tell more people I love them, or find reasons why they did a good job. That always helps .