Meh. I'm having the hardest time sleeping these past few weeks than ever before. Which is why I'm up now, when I should be asleep so I can work competently tonight. I went through all 30 pills of an Ambien prescription and all 30 pills of a Xanax prescription in less than a week, and I'm still sleeping like shit, if at all. Yes, BTW, I do have something of a drug problem. And it hasn't been helping me deal with all that's happened in the past month, so when I get settled back in New Orleans (I evacuated to my parents' place in Tennessee), I think I'm going to try rehab.
I'm driving back down to New Orleans on Saturday to check out the damage to my apartment building, and ideally pick up some clothes and stuff while I'm there. I'll also find out the fate of my kitties, who I had no choice to leave at home when I evacuated, since I was at work when Katrina hit and wasn't able to get back home after that because the area I live in was cordoned off by FEMA and the military. It is reportedly open now. I hope at least one of the pet rescue missions I contacted were able to break into my place and rescue them, or barring that, that they were able to escape through a broken window. I can barely keep from crying about it now, and if I get there and find them both dead, I'll be inconsolable. The process of life and death is a bit skewed when you live in city that lies below sea level.
But, if nothing else, I'll have at least a little relief from this crushing anxiety about the whole issue once I see the damage for myself. I don't intend to move out of New Orleans once it's habitable again, although my company is opening up an office in Tampa and would move me there if I so chose, but home (in this case, New Orleans) is home and I'm sick to death of moving -- I've moved 9 times since 1998.
Anyway, time to finish the last Smirnoff Ice in the fridge, take some Atarax, steal some Klonopin from my mom's stash, and hopefully get some sleep.
to all who have consoled me over the past month; I appreciate it and though it's only words, it does help.
Good night.
I'm driving back down to New Orleans on Saturday to check out the damage to my apartment building, and ideally pick up some clothes and stuff while I'm there. I'll also find out the fate of my kitties, who I had no choice to leave at home when I evacuated, since I was at work when Katrina hit and wasn't able to get back home after that because the area I live in was cordoned off by FEMA and the military. It is reportedly open now. I hope at least one of the pet rescue missions I contacted were able to break into my place and rescue them, or barring that, that they were able to escape through a broken window. I can barely keep from crying about it now, and if I get there and find them both dead, I'll be inconsolable. The process of life and death is a bit skewed when you live in city that lies below sea level.
But, if nothing else, I'll have at least a little relief from this crushing anxiety about the whole issue once I see the damage for myself. I don't intend to move out of New Orleans once it's habitable again, although my company is opening up an office in Tampa and would move me there if I so chose, but home (in this case, New Orleans) is home and I'm sick to death of moving -- I've moved 9 times since 1998.
Anyway, time to finish the last Smirnoff Ice in the fridge, take some Atarax, steal some Klonopin from my mom's stash, and hopefully get some sleep.
to all who have consoled me over the past month; I appreciate it and though it's only words, it does help.
Good night.
**and i love the poster you have in your pics, I printed it out until I can get the full size one**
take care
xoxo
I'm still holding out hope for your kittens.