yes i am still alive
i miss you guys so mucy (you know who you are)
i love you guys and i feels good to know you guys care. you bring a smile to my face...
its been really hard on me, luckly i a am the type of person who can make it through anything!! and i am just pushing along.
its hard though, its really hard to keep it all together. i lost everything a little over a week ago. i lost the love of my life, i lost my home, i lost my animals, i lots a friend, i lost strength. all my old fears and all caving down on me. my abandonmet issues are in full effect! yet again i have been kicked out, thrown out and abandond. and it really hurts.
its really weird how things happen though, today i went bike riding with my cousin, and i came across this bride. i used to have re-acurring dreams about this bride, and the streem that goes under it, i started having these dreams when i was with james. and its just really crazy that i seen the bride from my dreams today. it gave me the creeps!
and ontop of that me and my cousin where talking, everytime she has a baby(baby 3 now) i end up living with her due to a break up.
the first time her (then boyfriend, now husband) broke up, i was staying with my cousin and helping her take care of the baby.
a couple years went by, then she had another child. and at that time, i broke up with my ex, and came to live with my cousin, yet again, i am there due to a break up, helping her with her new baby.
and then she has her third kid, and again, james leaves me, kicks me out of the house, and now i am with my cousin while she takes care of her third baby.
its really werid to me, as if this is ment to be?
was this break up ment to be? and is it going to have a happy ending? i can only hope, and wait,
in time things change, for better or for worse. i just hope time is on my side!
at this point i feel like i am stuck falling down a wave, slipping further and further away from the top. and there is nothing i can do about it.
i miss you guys so mucy (you know who you are)
i love you guys and i feels good to know you guys care. you bring a smile to my face...
its been really hard on me, luckly i a am the type of person who can make it through anything!! and i am just pushing along.
its hard though, its really hard to keep it all together. i lost everything a little over a week ago. i lost the love of my life, i lost my home, i lost my animals, i lots a friend, i lost strength. all my old fears and all caving down on me. my abandonmet issues are in full effect! yet again i have been kicked out, thrown out and abandond. and it really hurts.
its really weird how things happen though, today i went bike riding with my cousin, and i came across this bride. i used to have re-acurring dreams about this bride, and the streem that goes under it, i started having these dreams when i was with james. and its just really crazy that i seen the bride from my dreams today. it gave me the creeps!
and ontop of that me and my cousin where talking, everytime she has a baby(baby 3 now) i end up living with her due to a break up.
the first time her (then boyfriend, now husband) broke up, i was staying with my cousin and helping her take care of the baby.
a couple years went by, then she had another child. and at that time, i broke up with my ex, and came to live with my cousin, yet again, i am there due to a break up, helping her with her new baby.
and then she has her third kid, and again, james leaves me, kicks me out of the house, and now i am with my cousin while she takes care of her third baby.
its really werid to me, as if this is ment to be?
was this break up ment to be? and is it going to have a happy ending? i can only hope, and wait,
in time things change, for better or for worse. i just hope time is on my side!
at this point i feel like i am stuck falling down a wave, slipping further and further away from the top. and there is nothing i can do about it.
VIEW 15 of 15 COMMENTS
I had a similar vicious gossip in my life a while ago, and after being initially horrified by what she was spreading, I then realized this person was really an asshole filter who was performing a service by removing people from my life who were inclined to believe nonsense. I'm not sure she won over anyone I actually know, but the point is that this dreadful experience you had will not be quite such a bad thing when the shock wears off.
It's not destiny, and fate is what you create. You mustn't let other people's flaws and uncivilized and insensitive behavior make you think there's something wrong with you.