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aurora_b_alice

Alaska

Member Since 2004

Followers 53 Following 31

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Tuesday Jan 25, 2005

Jan 25, 2005
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Went to a bridal shower the other day. It was an intense experience. Firsty, because it was a social situation I hadn't been in for awhile. It was a group of almost entirely strangers, a group of women, an occassion that called for lots of one on one chit chatting. Oddly enough, I've grown to be quite a hermit and I didn't do to well with all of the above. I was _trying_ to be social, keeping in mind the suggestions my boy had given me, but i found myself frozen with social inexperience. You would have thought I was home schooled or something. So I spent what felt like an hour joining the small audience that was intently listening to a young charming girl weave us into a detailed performance of how she had gone to Peru a month ago and contracted a terrible stomach virus that did atrocities to her digestive system. Yeah. She was a fantastic story teller, she held me wrapt in anticipation waiting to discover what sort of adventures her bowels would take her on next.
Secondly, my world was rocked as my mind wandered while the bride-to-be opened gifts and I observed the ultimate joy and confidence of everyone in the room that this union would be the most perfect and beautiful event. I hardly know her and even _I'm_ excited by the idea of her marrying her fiance. They are both incredible people, and in every way it seems like mother nature created these people for each other. I was jealous and terrified. I don't even want to go into why.
But last night I had a talk with the boy about it, and again he amazed me with his patience and understanding and open loving heart. Ultimately we agreed that I am being the best person I can be, and that as long as I keep focusing on my goals and listening to my feelings things will work out as they should. Actually there was a lot more than that, but I'm still digesting it all. Maybe I'll let you know how it goes.

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