no, i didn't make that picture. it's from explodingdog.
and no, i didn't die, but i definetly nearly almost did.
having your heart broken by the only boy you've ever loved is something i wasn't ready for, nor could i deal with well at all.
luckily he went back on it, and things are alright again, but i am dreading the day when it happens again, and for good perhaps.
it's very scary to find that i am extremely not okay without him. i never ever ever thought i would allow myself to get in the position for someone to break my heart like that, nor did i believe he was ever capable of hurting me that badly... but i guess the lesson in a first heart-break is that anyone has it in them to hurt you that bad and you just can't let them. you can't put yourself in that place.
it's almost like i cheated the system by finding that out without really having to give up my first love. it was definetly reality giving me a huge slap in the face... and now hopefully i can go about bettering myself and killing that naive girl that i temporarily allowed myself to become.
but he makes me so weak in the knees and full in the heart that when i look at him i don't know if i'll ever believe that he can't give me the world.
being lovesick is retarded and is a state that i never ever thought i would be in. the past 6 months and the new unimproved amber is so out of character. how do i abandon this person i have become.
hopefully i've learned my first life lesson and will never ever forget how i have felt for the past five days. i need to keep a little bit of this heartbreak with me forever.
and no, i didn't die, but i definetly nearly almost did.
having your heart broken by the only boy you've ever loved is something i wasn't ready for, nor could i deal with well at all.
luckily he went back on it, and things are alright again, but i am dreading the day when it happens again, and for good perhaps.
it's very scary to find that i am extremely not okay without him. i never ever ever thought i would allow myself to get in the position for someone to break my heart like that, nor did i believe he was ever capable of hurting me that badly... but i guess the lesson in a first heart-break is that anyone has it in them to hurt you that bad and you just can't let them. you can't put yourself in that place.
it's almost like i cheated the system by finding that out without really having to give up my first love. it was definetly reality giving me a huge slap in the face... and now hopefully i can go about bettering myself and killing that naive girl that i temporarily allowed myself to become.
but he makes me so weak in the knees and full in the heart that when i look at him i don't know if i'll ever believe that he can't give me the world.
being lovesick is retarded and is a state that i never ever thought i would be in. the past 6 months and the new unimproved amber is so out of character. how do i abandon this person i have become.
hopefully i've learned my first life lesson and will never ever forget how i have felt for the past five days. i need to keep a little bit of this heartbreak with me forever.
VIEW 23 of 23 COMMENTS
" but he makes me so weak in the knees and full in the heart that when i look at him i don't know if i'll ever believe that he can't give me the world."
You're poetic without falling into the realm of Hallmark, and truthful to the point of pain. Thinking something that beautiful, letting alone writing it, deserves respect.
I'm going through something akin to your experience. the relationship I have between my girl and I is one of constant heartbreak on both sides. We almost ended it very recently and have a few times. we keep coming back, but each time the reality of the situation hits a little harder
wouldn't we just be happier with other people? or alone?
who knows. I love the girl, but giving in constantly could be detrimental for both of us.
keep that in mind. try and picture yourself with someone else. if you can...then maybe you should