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aubergine

Member Since 2010

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Thursday May 05, 2011

May 5, 2011
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I got completely enraged yesterday after reading a couple of blogs about a trashy teen television drama (Gossip Girl) that portrayed violence against women in a completely horrible light.

See:
The scene from Gossip Girl on YouTube

Jezebel - Violence Passed Off as Romance on Gossip Girl

Sociological Images - Excusing Abusive Behavior on GG

This really triggered a lot of emotions on things that I am going through right now, and it made me immediately want to speak up. I know that it is hard for women, or for that fact any person, in abusive situations to feel as though their voice can be heard, but it's imperative that we do just that. I posted this on my facebook today, to many people who I know who have no idea the situation I have been in during the last several months.

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Today is the day I've decided to speak up and speak out. A blog I posted here really struck a chord and it has made me want to do something, something to make sure other people who are experiencing domestic abuse/violence feel like they can have a voice, that they don't have to feel ashamed. I was in an abusive and violent relationship for years, and I am proud to say that last fall I left that situation.

Although I am a positive person, the effects of the daily struggles in that abusive relationship crippled me and I am still recovering. I do have a renewed sense of hope and vigor, however, and I look forward to the day when I feel well enough to help other people who have been in my situation. It's not always easy to find a voice, but I am here to say that it is worth the fight.
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Violence and abuse in any relationship is not okay. I hope that me speaking out now may help someone else have the courage to do so, as well. In the future, I am looking forward to helping others in my situation through volunteer work or other efforts.
ribbonsundone:
Totally unacceptable. I applaud you for standing up for healthy relationships and not quasi "sexy" violence which is so prevalent in our mainstream rape culture. You know what, I'm sick of the cad. You go to jail. It was recommended I watch both Gossip Girl and Mad Men. I tried both. I'm all full up on misogynistic, heteronormative (often via troubled homoeroticism), reifications of violence as passion, violence as sex, violence as proof of care so overwhelming that because it is killing you (metaphorically) you must kill your partner (literally, even if by inches). Fuck. NO.

I've got a background that includes a lot of violence, and I will not accept it in my media or casual conversation. Have you read Cunt or Rose by Inga Muscio? They aren't perfect, but they are energizing.


SPOILERS! (Click to view)

Incidentally, should this job work out I would be stopping this pattern from happening. More on that as it emerges.


May 6, 2011
joker_:
Well done.
May 9, 2011

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