atti

In lieu of everything that has transpired over the last six weeks I still find myself surprised at some things that happen to me. I thought to myself "how could things get any more out of control than they are" and then I wake up in the morning to find myself staring at a message someone left me that morning or a voice mail, leaving me "shocking" news. Sometimes I feel I'm a drama magnet... ugh.

I woke up today on the eighth day of my posting as being the only person in the apartment. It was cold again. Waking shivering is the worst feeling in the world. It makes you not want to get out of the bed and get ready for the day and also it makes you want to sleep the rest of the day away. I bolted for the bathroom and immediately turned on the shower before jumping into my sobering and scalding morning shower.

Tomorrow is New Years Eve, to me another night. I say this because of my state of my mind currently. I regarded Christmas as just another day because to me it was. Another Tuesday that I spent alone, eating pizza and rejoicing in the birth of Christ with myself. Hallelujah. What am I going to do tomorrow? I'm going to wake up, just like any other day. And sit here with the same noble intentions of trying to do something productive, but most likely wile away what time I have doing absolutely nothing beneficial. The new year will come, I'll probably be watching tv and the ball drop at the same time. And then when "happy new year" hits I'll turn it off and go back to my life. It still will be there. People have the funny idea that the new year has some magical ability to wipe your slate clean. Pretty sure that debt and stress supersedes time.

The good news in this somewhat dreary post is that I've been making some minor progress on a few short story ideas and one larger idea that hopefully will ignite some inner fire of mine to get off my ass and put a few hours of work each day into these side projects. Only time will tell I suppose. But alas, the laundry is done, I'm still naked and I should probably cloth myself before going to get lunch. Perhaps I'll do a second entry in this later today. Stay tuned.