ataxia

i guess i needed a refresher on what it means to be goth...
(bad joke, i know)

well....what to do now....

ouch.

you're unsure and you're not ready so that must mean I want you
you're unavailable and disinterested and to you I look for
comfort

a million times in a million ways I will try to change you
a million months and a million days I'll try to somehow convince
you

I have waited for you and adjusted for you and I'm done
I have deferred to you and enabled you and I'm done

you're too young or you're too old or you're simply not inclined
you're asleep or you're withholding be that my cue to crave you

several times in several ways I'll try to squeeze love from you
several hours and several ways I'll feast on scraps thrown from
you

I have bent for you and I've deprived for you and I'm done
I have depressed for you and contorted for you and I'm done
I have stifled for you and I've compromised for you and I'm done
I have silenced for you and sacrificed for you and I'm done

it won't be long before I am reclaimed
it won't take long and I'll be on path again
it won't be easy for us to disengage
I'm at the end of self deprivation stage

you're afraid of every woman afraid of your inner workings
you cringe at the thought of living under the same roof as me
god and everything

a million times and a million ways I've tried to alter to match
you
several times every several days I've tried to uncrush on you


~alanis