atalanta

Atalanta was a young woman and a fierce huntress. She went on an expedition to kill a boar with her lover, Meleager. Atalanta participated in the hunt and struck the first wound, though Meleager killed the boar. She was awarded the hide because she drew first blood. Meleager killed six men in her name; two that tried to rape her, two that insulted her, and two that were angry and insulted because the hide of the boar was given to a woman. Two of these men were Meleagers uncles, and consequently Meleager was killed by his own mother in retribution for thier death. Atalanta's father wanted her to marry, but she felt it would be a betrayal to Meleager. He made a deal with her that she would marry anybody who could beat her in a foot race. Anyone who tried to beat her and failed, however, would be killed. She outran many suitors, who were then executed. The suitor Hippomenes was enthralled by her beauty and she was also attracted to him. Atalanta begged him not to race her (and risk his life), but he could not be dissuaded. The goddess Aphrodite gave him three golden apples and told him to drop them one at a time to distract Atalanta. Sure enough, she stopped running long enough to retrieve each golden apple. It took all three apples and all of his speed, but Hippomenes finally succeeded, winning the race and Atalanta's hand. Some versions hold that she used the apples as an excuse to let him win.

Did I let someone win my heart or did he always have the power? I have been accused in the past of being addictive and poisonous. It's funny how relationships between things turn up after so long and are the last thing you would ever expect to happen.

Lately some very important things have been happening in my life. Changes have been taking place and things have been becoming more clear to me. Some things, however, get more confusing, disturbing, and upsetting as each day passes. I need to figure some more things out and try to really do what is best for me. It is hard.

I've been listening to alot of depressing music. Nothing can really beat driving alone on a beautiful day down a road covered with trees. Driving through the patches of shade and sun while listening to really meaningful sad music. Yesterday it was Iron and Wine and Bright Eyes. Amazing how it can at once make me cry in grief and cleanse and calm me.

I hate talking about myself, but I enjoy when people ask or are interested.

"Love's an excuse to get hurt
And to hurt
Do you like to hurt?
I do, I do
Then hurt me"
BE