asyla

Im so down right now it sucks.
i feel like crying.
like nothing is going right anymore and im fighting to stay positive.
i dont have many friends and yes thats a personal choice.
but i dont have anyone to talk to when i need it most.
and i am the least emotional person in the group.
but right now. this night.
i cant pretend.

i dont want to say im lonely or depressed because i dont think thats it.
i dont know what it is anymore. im so tired of fighting for everything.
i just want some peace.
and maybe someone to share it with someday.
sometimes i really feel like a cant stand my ex.
but in times like this i dont want to be alone.
so we get back together and break up and i want to punch him so hard. and never speak to him again.
give me some comfirming sign of something greater than this!
fuck!

im mean, stubborn, bitchy, rude, and dont care.

but tonight i care. im sad. and im sorry.