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astrix

Worcester, MA

Hopeful Since 2009

Followers 239 Following 157

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Wednesday Jul 15, 2009

Jul 15, 2009
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So my first set will be going live in the hopeful section on September 4th! I almost can't believe it. I remember when an ex of mine boasted that they were going to do the whole SG thing and I was so jealous. Jealous of the label, of her confidence, of her beauty, but most of all I was jealous of her guts. She had the courage to put herself out there into a whole different world from her own and say fuck my insecurities I want to do this, so I'm going to go after it!

It's been 2 years since then and now I'm the one saying fuck you to my insecurities and everyone who thinks I can't do this, because I know I can. Even if I don't succeed in becoming a Suicide Girl, I can't look back on it with regret that I didn't try, because I am.

I've always been comfortable with nakedness, but stripping down for a camera was a new thing for me, not necessarily a bad thing, but definitely new. I was a little uncomfortable at first, but quickly my nerves calmed and I got into a more creative and daring mindset. I stopped worrying about how my belly looked and started scanning the shack we were shooting in for interesting shots and angles. I ended up climbing through windows, up trees and on doors. I also ended up with about a million mosquito bites in a some "unmentionable" places... damn it for forgetting bug spray (never ever again...).

Anyways, I hope everyone enjoys my first set (entitled "Diamond in the Rough" due to both my modeling experience and the location) and if you don't, I had fun making it so fuck you! Just kidding.... Kind of.

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