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ash

NY

SG Since 2003

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Friday Oct 14, 2005

Oct 14, 2005
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I really appreciate the hell out of all of you that read my long journal rant yesterday, and not only that, but you all left really awesome comments. It made me feel great after what I went through with that bastard. Sometimes I just need to know other ppls opinions and suggestions.

To clarify a few things though, it wasnt like I stayed completely calm the whole time ... in fact, I think there were a couple moments in which I couldve stayed a LOT calmer. I had to excuse myself to the restroom for a good cry because the frustration was SO overpowering that I couldve screamed and flew across the table and massacred him, its a good thing I made the right decision cuz I NEED this job.

Also, when he kept repeating himself over and over again ... I got really frustrated .. and I clenched my teeth and forced the most ridiculous looking smile of all time, but u could probably still see the hatred in my eyes .. so I mustve looked constipated or something, haha. I just kept thinking abt how badly my son needed me .. and I dunno how I made it thru that mess. Anyone who knows me in real life knows that I have virtually NO restraint, and I act on impulse WAAY more often than I should, sadly. I try to control it, but Im just such a spaz. My man has never seen me hold back so much .. in fact, if he wasnt there, Id probably have lost it completely.



On a lighter note .. though I have my *rent* situation under control, my sons birthday is NOT. I know that he is a sweet boy and doesnt really care if he gets a lot of expensive things, but I received a lot of offers to help me out for his special day, and I made him another amazon wishlist. 90% of the toys on there are under $20, and probably half of them are around $10. The items marked "must have" are the ones he SPECIFICALLY asked for, and all the others are ones that I *know* he would love, but just didnt think of them on his own. His Bday is on the 25th, BUT! We're having his part on the FOLLOWING weekend, not just to allow more time for me, lol, but because my man wont be able to make it the week before due to training for the new job.

I love you all. I cant even express to you all how very much I appreciate all the kind words and encouragement Ive received. Some of the comments I got brought tears to my eyes to read, good tears though. Awww shucks, I didnt mean to let on that I actually have feelings n crap. smile

q's
~What was your favorite toy growing up?
~What new toys have u seen that you know u wouldve LOVED as a child? (or maybe u love them NOW!)
~How do you feel abt birthdays, either your own, or in general?
VIEW 25 of 65 COMMENTS
alterednative:
kiss
Oct 20, 2005
corneilus_wright:
~What was your favorite toy growing up?
Didn't really have one

~What new toys have u seen that you know u wouldve LOVED as a child? (or maybe u love them NOW!)
those new lightsabers that light up and make the real noises are awesome

~How do you feel about birthdays, either your own, or in general?
it is a good excuese for a party smile


it always seems like just when I start thinking that people are really tolerant and caring at heart something like you situation happens frown I hope the work situation is getting better
Oct 21, 2005

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