I have decided that I want to actively focus on the book I have been writing on and off for the past couple of years. People who know me, will remember that throughout much of 2006, I was permanently accompanied by a notebook, which I could be seen scribbling in at really odd moments. This activity was only the tip of the iceberg. Some of what I wrote was torn up and thrown away, and some of its offcuts wound up here in this Blog, however much of it was collated and lovingly transcribed, as and when I felt motivated to do so.
However 2006 was a very dark time, and I am a very dark person. I decided to leave the book alone for a while, for the sake of my own sanity. Any book that I could feel proud of, would have to be suitably relentless. Attempts at forcing my nihlistic agenda onto the reader were actually causing me, the writer, some considerable problems, so I back-burnered the whole thing, and moved into the far more wholesome areas of the arts that are rock music management and Soft Core ALT Porn.
But I have never been fully able to leave the book alone. Now I have got to the point that I feel like I actually need to finish it. Not for totally self indulgent reasons, but becuase I feel that there is a valid reason for me to write it. In recent weeks, my feelings about the book have grown into an obsession. It needs to be written, if only to serve as a historical document, if anything.
I am a fairly interesting person, have met some fairly interesting people, and have been in some fairly interesting situations (sometimes really fucking WRONG, ANOMALOUS and BIZZARRE situations) I also have a slightly freakish brain that causes me to remember nearly everything that has ever happened, or I have learned, with ridiculously specific detail. I am also angry, and this anger has now morphed into a new strange almost Zen like anger, that causes me to be past caring when faced with pretty much any stimulous.
I want to merge tales of sex, drugs and death, with my wider statements of how I feel about the world in general. My teenage years were dominated by my spending hours reading in the local library in the daytime, and my night times taking LSD and poor quality coke with local reprobates, and I fear that this lifestyle trait will never fully leave me.
On every page I want to squeeze in just about every external reference I can and bring in just about every name I can. I want to produce a unified theory of my world and a Post Modern analysis of the general shallowness and apathy of the Late Capitalist Period in which the book is set.(ie now). Once written, I will have to seriously consider how much of it I can actually get away with (I think a lot of what I have written of late has seriously infringed on Copywrite and Libel laws).
I have taken to listening to Public Enemy when I write. I want this to influence the rhythm and the tone of what I am producing.
Anyways, this is what I am doing with my time now. I have become very bored recently, and I need to flex my intellectual muscles. I want to finish this book by spring of next year. That is my aim with it. However, if I dont, its no big deal, some of the stuff in it, is re-workings of stuff I wrote 5 years ago. I could possibly wind up working what I am doing now into whatever I am writing in 20 years time, and am a fat old house-wife and am trying to kill whatever boredom and malaise I am facing in that point. Or perhaps I could just go out in a crack fueled blaze of glory before then. But right now, I feel motivated, and motivation, is like, er a good thing. you know?
Oh yeah, if you fancy BEING IN MY BOOK, you can be. Chances are, if you know me, you will be in it in some form anyways (although I will change your name and any incriminating details, of course).
However, if you want to be in it, or if you feel you have something to say, that NEEDS to be recorded in print, then feel free to offer your services. I am looking for people to describe either themselves, to provide a good well rounded charcter study, or to describe any encounter, conversation or incident they find funny/ inspiring/annoying/anything really. Provided it is interesting, and most importantly, that it rocks!
Conversely, if you really DONT want anything to do with it, and want any possible allusions to you, stricken from the manuscript forever, then speak up, or forever hold your peace (you paranoid bastards, you!)
However 2006 was a very dark time, and I am a very dark person. I decided to leave the book alone for a while, for the sake of my own sanity. Any book that I could feel proud of, would have to be suitably relentless. Attempts at forcing my nihlistic agenda onto the reader were actually causing me, the writer, some considerable problems, so I back-burnered the whole thing, and moved into the far more wholesome areas of the arts that are rock music management and Soft Core ALT Porn.
But I have never been fully able to leave the book alone. Now I have got to the point that I feel like I actually need to finish it. Not for totally self indulgent reasons, but becuase I feel that there is a valid reason for me to write it. In recent weeks, my feelings about the book have grown into an obsession. It needs to be written, if only to serve as a historical document, if anything.
I am a fairly interesting person, have met some fairly interesting people, and have been in some fairly interesting situations (sometimes really fucking WRONG, ANOMALOUS and BIZZARRE situations) I also have a slightly freakish brain that causes me to remember nearly everything that has ever happened, or I have learned, with ridiculously specific detail. I am also angry, and this anger has now morphed into a new strange almost Zen like anger, that causes me to be past caring when faced with pretty much any stimulous.
I want to merge tales of sex, drugs and death, with my wider statements of how I feel about the world in general. My teenage years were dominated by my spending hours reading in the local library in the daytime, and my night times taking LSD and poor quality coke with local reprobates, and I fear that this lifestyle trait will never fully leave me.
On every page I want to squeeze in just about every external reference I can and bring in just about every name I can. I want to produce a unified theory of my world and a Post Modern analysis of the general shallowness and apathy of the Late Capitalist Period in which the book is set.(ie now). Once written, I will have to seriously consider how much of it I can actually get away with (I think a lot of what I have written of late has seriously infringed on Copywrite and Libel laws).
I have taken to listening to Public Enemy when I write. I want this to influence the rhythm and the tone of what I am producing.
Anyways, this is what I am doing with my time now. I have become very bored recently, and I need to flex my intellectual muscles. I want to finish this book by spring of next year. That is my aim with it. However, if I dont, its no big deal, some of the stuff in it, is re-workings of stuff I wrote 5 years ago. I could possibly wind up working what I am doing now into whatever I am writing in 20 years time, and am a fat old house-wife and am trying to kill whatever boredom and malaise I am facing in that point. Or perhaps I could just go out in a crack fueled blaze of glory before then. But right now, I feel motivated, and motivation, is like, er a good thing. you know?
Oh yeah, if you fancy BEING IN MY BOOK, you can be. Chances are, if you know me, you will be in it in some form anyways (although I will change your name and any incriminating details, of course).
However, if you want to be in it, or if you feel you have something to say, that NEEDS to be recorded in print, then feel free to offer your services. I am looking for people to describe either themselves, to provide a good well rounded charcter study, or to describe any encounter, conversation or incident they find funny/ inspiring/annoying/anything really. Provided it is interesting, and most importantly, that it rocks!
Conversely, if you really DONT want anything to do with it, and want any possible allusions to you, stricken from the manuscript forever, then speak up, or forever hold your peace (you paranoid bastards, you!)
VIEW 3 of 3 COMMENTS
asbo:
Well, I am trying to stick with a rule that I must spend at least 1 hour a day working on the book, no matter how great/shit I feel. I am quite pleased with this rule, becuase it means that it will add a certain realism to the book. Its very cut and paste anyways, so it means that the tone shifts all over the place, which is great becuase it makes it feel so much more human, in spite of the fact it is supposed to be an ironic, nihlistic rant about the state of the word. I actually want there to be a whole vulnerability to the whole thing, you know? Grrr. I have a cold and I think I need to drink loads of orange juice then go to bed. Props again for the Vegan DVD! Everyone should watch this!
mark_plus_beer:
your childhood sounds abit like mine