Masturbation is a gift from God.
VIEW 3 of 3 COMMENTS
bla
VIEW 9 of 9 COMMENTS
franandzooey:
Whoa that a bitchin' amp!
What the hell, I can't believe it shattered the window...I always haul a bunch of stuff in my car...I should learn from you and secure stuff from now on.
wtf!
What the hell, I can't believe it shattered the window...I always haul a bunch of stuff in my car...I should learn from you and secure stuff from now on.
wtf!
franandzooey:
Thanks cutie! I was gonna' make you buy me a magazine subscription for my birthday but it looks like you have enough payments and expenses going on right now.
Your off the hook for now.
Your off the hook for now.
VIEW 4 of 4 COMMENTS
nadya:
hey.. you don't have to lie to be my friend. We all know you're hung like a two year old.. but hey, that's ok 'cuz you're pretty like a flower.
t3chmonkey:
I think they must make fully Automated Stepford Wife versions of those Real Dolls, because I see quite a few of them walking around looking just like that in the affluent shopping district where I work.
Dismantle_me's cracking me up. And your job rocks just because you get to deliver that punchline anytime someone asks.
Woo-ha. You guys are fun.
Dismantle_me's cracking me up. And your job rocks just because you get to deliver that punchline anytime someone asks.
Woo-ha. You guys are fun.
4:20AM. A friend of minejust got over testicular cancer right. So everyone is smoking round me...but I don't smoke (just does'nt do anything for me) but he's got these THC pills left over from his cancer therapy or whatever. So I take one.
I think I am immune to THC. This is supposed to be the most concentrated shit out there, prescribed for dudes LOOSING...
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I think I am immune to THC. This is supposed to be the most concentrated shit out there, prescribed for dudes LOOSING...
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VIEW 3 of 3 COMMENTS
nadya:
"so any of you girlies that want to come over and help me test it out for quality control and sturdiness just let me know."
ME!!! PICK ME!!!
ME!!! PICK ME!!!
viciousdemalice:
New beds rock, as in they are rock hard until you break them in, the fun way. I would pay large amounts of money to see a guy dressed as Captain America give Big Ugly Stupid Hick a nice kick to those pea-sized balls of his.
Don't diss the country music dude, Johnny Cash rocks, and some of this stuff has serious issues in the lyrics. No I don't mean that Angry American patriotic shit, I'm talking about suicide, alcoholism, death, betrayal, depression, murder, hard core shit I haven't heard from any credulous bands in the mainstream rock. So it has a fiddle in it, so the fucker plays a banjo, so what? SOME of it is still cool. But thanks for the hick-style commentary, gave me good laugh. Enjoy the new bed and waffles!!!
Don't diss the country music dude, Johnny Cash rocks, and some of this stuff has serious issues in the lyrics. No I don't mean that Angry American patriotic shit, I'm talking about suicide, alcoholism, death, betrayal, depression, murder, hard core shit I haven't heard from any credulous bands in the mainstream rock. So it has a fiddle in it, so the fucker plays a banjo, so what? SOME of it is still cool. But thanks for the hick-style commentary, gave me good laugh. Enjoy the new bed and waffles!!!
Things to do before I die.
1. Write a screenplay.
2. Be a pornstar for a day.
3. Feed viagra to the monkeys at the zoo on childrens day and watch all the parents try to explain that shit to their 2 year old.
4. Fall (and stay) in love.
5. Buy every kid in the world a pez dispenser or a grenade launcher...they get...
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1. Write a screenplay.
2. Be a pornstar for a day.
3. Feed viagra to the monkeys at the zoo on childrens day and watch all the parents try to explain that shit to their 2 year old.
4. Fall (and stay) in love.
5. Buy every kid in the world a pez dispenser or a grenade launcher...they get...
Read More
VIEW 15 of 15 COMMENTS
nadya:
the new pics are hot my lil' cuntcake.
nadya:
I'm bored so i thought of more...
1. Build a replica of KITT from Knight Rider, complete with hotline to British man, on call 24 hours a day to provide KITT's voice.
2. Play darts, but instead of darts, use ducks.
3. Tattoo a butterfly on my vagina.
4. Sober up, remove said tattoo.
5. Not make out with any more tiny asian women.
6. Meet Mr. Feeny from Boy Meets World. Why? See number one.
7. Spoon feed oatmeal to David Hasselhoff.
8. Legally change last name to "Vulva".
9. Slip a llama a roofie.
10. Ride in a tank while naked and listening to Black Sabbath.
and i'm spent.
1. Build a replica of KITT from Knight Rider, complete with hotline to British man, on call 24 hours a day to provide KITT's voice.
2. Play darts, but instead of darts, use ducks.
3. Tattoo a butterfly on my vagina.
4. Sober up, remove said tattoo.
5. Not make out with any more tiny asian women.
6. Meet Mr. Feeny from Boy Meets World. Why? See number one.
7. Spoon feed oatmeal to David Hasselhoff.
8. Legally change last name to "Vulva".
9. Slip a llama a roofie.
10. Ride in a tank while naked and listening to Black Sabbath.
and i'm spent.
You ever just want to break shit.
Just grab a baseball bat and take it to that nice new Mercedes that fucking yuppie just parked across the street. Or walk into a grocery store with a sledgehammer and stalk methodically ailse to ailse, smashing gallons of milk, OJ....grabbing a bottle of jack....takin a swig and throwing across the store...playin baseball with every fruit in produce...
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Just grab a baseball bat and take it to that nice new Mercedes that fucking yuppie just parked across the street. Or walk into a grocery store with a sledgehammer and stalk methodically ailse to ailse, smashing gallons of milk, OJ....grabbing a bottle of jack....takin a swig and throwing across the store...playin baseball with every fruit in produce...
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calle:
No, U suk big fat donkey balls!
In a good mood today? Geez- I hope that I'm not in the store when you get there.
In a good mood today? Geez- I hope that I'm not in the store when you get there.
nadya:
come with me, yes?
Gotta get off, gonna get
Out of this merry-go-round
Gotta get off, gonna get out
Out of this merry-go-round
Gotta get off, gonna get out
nadya:
Elderphile?... you wish grandpa. 
Well, last night I ended up bartending a graduation party through a friend of a friend. I bought almost $2k worth of liquor and misc. shite!
The party went over so well, and all the compliments about my bartending skills inflated my head so much that I'm looking at starting a off site bartending/alcohol catering service.
Most people have never experienced the quality drinks fresh...
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The party went over so well, and all the compliments about my bartending skills inflated my head so much that I'm looking at starting a off site bartending/alcohol catering service.
Most people have never experienced the quality drinks fresh...
Read More
drexel:
aww thanks. i went anonymous for a couple days. i had what i thought was a perfectly valid argument, but one of my unmercifully witty friends shot holes right through my theory. and here i am.
i went anonymous for a couple days. i had what i thought was a perfectly valid argument, but one of my unmercifully witty friends shot holes right through my theory. and here i am. ~In everyone's life, at some time, our inner fire goes out. It is then burst into flame by an encounter with another human being. We should all be thankful for those people who rekindle the inner spirit. ~ Albert Schweitzer ~
Thankful indeed. There are few things in life that suprise me. Few people who come into it that I feel are worth my time...
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Thankful indeed. There are few things in life that suprise me. Few people who come into it that I feel are worth my time...
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drexel:
??
Toodles.