Sometimes you forget to count your blessings...
...other times random shit just MAKES you count them...
Today I was watching news footage of the assault of Fallujah on Democracy Now.
...it's one thing to KNOW that guys you used to serve with and trained are possibly still in the Corps and out there. You kinda just hope they're doing alright.
It's another thing to see and recognize one of them on T.V. in the middle of a combat zone.
It's surreal to think that I was one decision away from being there now...and I'm lucky in many respects that things went the way they did. And I'm hit with a mixture of guilt and relief for not being right next to my former comrade.
I hate war. I thank God every day I never witnessed war...never fought it. I've seen things that made my conscience squirm without ever firing a single shot. I have a friend who came back from Iraq twisted up on the inside after some of the things he did...things he felt he was forced to do. Things none of us would want to believe "our country" is capable of.
I hate hypocracy.
I hate the fact that we wring our hands over 1,000 of our own soliders, who volunteered and are equipped as warriors to make war, and we never...ever...speak of the estimated 100,000 iraqi civilian casualties that have occured in this war. Sacrifice is not endemic to America...and neither is tragedy. Maybe I'm wrong...maybe the value of life is completely defined by nationality, by race, by geography. If American history and our not so distant future is any indication...that is exactly the case. But I know I'm right...because the very ideals we cling to...despite a history replete with errors are ones that at their very core are humanistic. Not nationalistic...not militarisitic...
...not anything they've been twisted into being.
The America I dream about is one in which we are less a club of rich fat cats intent on some new "manifest destiny" and one which is really intellectually and spiritually motivated by human rights...of men...neither American or Panamanian or Iraqi.
We talk the talk...but my fear is we will never walk the walk. And this is the truth that I believe fuels terror...fuels war...and fuels the ignorance in our own nation.
Forgive my rant. I'm tired.
...other times random shit just MAKES you count them...
Today I was watching news footage of the assault of Fallujah on Democracy Now.
...it's one thing to KNOW that guys you used to serve with and trained are possibly still in the Corps and out there. You kinda just hope they're doing alright.
It's another thing to see and recognize one of them on T.V. in the middle of a combat zone.
It's surreal to think that I was one decision away from being there now...and I'm lucky in many respects that things went the way they did. And I'm hit with a mixture of guilt and relief for not being right next to my former comrade.
I hate war. I thank God every day I never witnessed war...never fought it. I've seen things that made my conscience squirm without ever firing a single shot. I have a friend who came back from Iraq twisted up on the inside after some of the things he did...things he felt he was forced to do. Things none of us would want to believe "our country" is capable of.
I hate hypocracy.
I hate the fact that we wring our hands over 1,000 of our own soliders, who volunteered and are equipped as warriors to make war, and we never...ever...speak of the estimated 100,000 iraqi civilian casualties that have occured in this war. Sacrifice is not endemic to America...and neither is tragedy. Maybe I'm wrong...maybe the value of life is completely defined by nationality, by race, by geography. If American history and our not so distant future is any indication...that is exactly the case. But I know I'm right...because the very ideals we cling to...despite a history replete with errors are ones that at their very core are humanistic. Not nationalistic...not militarisitic...
...not anything they've been twisted into being.
The America I dream about is one in which we are less a club of rich fat cats intent on some new "manifest destiny" and one which is really intellectually and spiritually motivated by human rights...of men...neither American or Panamanian or Iraqi.
We talk the talk...but my fear is we will never walk the walk. And this is the truth that I believe fuels terror...fuels war...and fuels the ignorance in our own nation.
Forgive my rant. I'm tired.
VIEW 6 of 6 COMMENTS
I know what you are saying. I agree with you totally.
Some people blame humanities troubles on the selfishness of other men; I dont think thats the problem. Guilt over our own flaws is what fuels our willful ignorance. Ego and denial keeps us from walking our talk.