2am, i shouldn't be up, knackered, but i don't want to sleep, not listening to my body is fun.
Proper health reject at the moment, problems popping up all over the place, and the current ones getting worse. Can't even have sex without being in pain now, and by pain, i mean curl up in a ball and cry pain. Might as well just get it over and done with and rip out my womb, it's probably useless now anyway, and it causes nothing but pain and.. well that's it really, it doesn't do much else. I've never actually had pain with sex prior to yesterday, i mean sure when i've been a bit dry or whatever, but this pain was different, it was the pain i've experienced for years randomly. I'm too scared to actually try having sex again, which is fucking great, already been without for a couple of weeks and now i can't for risk of excruciating pain. I wish it was all alright, then it wouldn't make Jon upset, seriously he's never upset, and yet yesterday there were tears in his eyes, he didn't admit to being upset though, but i know what i saw.
Need to apply to work at college soon, but the application form is pretty confusing, probably need to think about it alot before i write anything... reading my writing is another matter. I can't be bothered writing anymore.. would you believe i'm in pain.. ouch, bye.
Proper health reject at the moment, problems popping up all over the place, and the current ones getting worse. Can't even have sex without being in pain now, and by pain, i mean curl up in a ball and cry pain. Might as well just get it over and done with and rip out my womb, it's probably useless now anyway, and it causes nothing but pain and.. well that's it really, it doesn't do much else. I've never actually had pain with sex prior to yesterday, i mean sure when i've been a bit dry or whatever, but this pain was different, it was the pain i've experienced for years randomly. I'm too scared to actually try having sex again, which is fucking great, already been without for a couple of weeks and now i can't for risk of excruciating pain. I wish it was all alright, then it wouldn't make Jon upset, seriously he's never upset, and yet yesterday there were tears in his eyes, he didn't admit to being upset though, but i know what i saw.
Need to apply to work at college soon, but the application form is pretty confusing, probably need to think about it alot before i write anything... reading my writing is another matter. I can't be bothered writing anymore.. would you believe i'm in pain.. ouch, bye.
aesirr:
Oooh that's not too good, hope you feel better soon. Also hope you get that job, I might bitch about it but my job is funding my proposed trip to Texas next year.