"I don't know what to say here. Three minutes before the biggest game of our lives."
Well what I'm not going to type is Al Pacino's speech from Any Given Sunday. That would be redundant because somebody, somewhere will have gone to the trouble of sticking it online and now everyone uses that speech to 'fire themselves up' before a big game. I don't. But I don;t play big games, I dominate until the game ain't big. Which is a lie because the only game I've played like a mofo has been Shadow of the Colossus which is brilliant. Killing 200ft monster with a sword using your brain is great unil you reach the last fecker when after many attempts end in ignominious failure you're forced to turn to the FAQ to win the bastard thing thereby turning yourself into a cheat and thus to shake off the horrible feelings that go with being a Grobblelaar you retreat into an introverted coma until shit makes sense and one comes out refreshed and challenged only to see one's Jarl wearing a heavy pewter bear on his head and dressed in Indianapolis blue. Coincidence? I think perhaps. Perhaps he thought like I back last April when thinking about the Superbowl. Have to ask him. He's got a new front door, 600 bearskin, a signed Rangers jersey and everything.
After rereading the above I think it's a great thing that I killed my political aspirations years ago. Imagine this being used against me in a public court. I'd be labelled ignorant by the media and my opponents. The same type of people Rex Grossman labelled ignorant early this week. And he's right. Hence if the media labelled me ignorant does that make me a double twat or reversely-intelligent. Who knows. Who cares. Obviously I do otherwise I'd never have pressed the keys typing it out on a blog for the world to see. But I care about tonight more. The big game.
Obviously I'm going with the Bears. I've got money on them for feck's sake. And I get to pat myself on teh back if the win since I picked this matchup back last April. Of course many things had to happen for this to happen. Colts defence had to rise up, Patriots defence needed to suffer an unprecedented collapse. Yet the Colts are seven points favourite? Vegas like it's punters I feel. Everyone once in a while they'll toss out a line to the knowledgeable ones who don't toss a bet out. Like the year the Rams were 17pt faves over the Pats, and the year the Raiders were faves over the Bucs and the year the line on the Steelers were ridiculously short. I know things. Get money on the Bears.
Things I've learned recently:
Jesus this keyboard is dirty.
Splinter Cell agents can't swim. Seriously. Well they can't in Pandora Tomorrow. All those millions spent on training a super secret agent and the bastard can't swim. Take a bullet yes. But put him near water and he's fucked! I'm not at all bitter about this. No. No. No.
Books you spend years waiting to read really aren't very good.
I like wool.
I suck at Connect 4 but am the shit at Cribbage and Mah Jongg.
Al Gore freaks my arse stupid in the informational sense. (In other words I watched An Inconvenient Truth. It'll happen to you too if you see it by any means necessary)
70's soundtracks from cheap films rule.
Classic Sooty rules. New Sooty will trigger unprecedented obscene use of the obscene c-word.
My next book comes together nicely.
Tricia Helfer wears a wig for Battlestar Galactica. Somehow I've lost respect for the show.
I believe that someday I'll perfect an Idi Amin version of 'Art Star' by the Yeah Yeah Yeahs. My first attempt in the shower this morning was quite corking in my tone deaf ears.
Idi Amin was quite a disturbed c*nt. But for some reason he warms the cockles of my heart.
If my brains were in my arse, I'd speak diarrhoea. So enough foulage, take it away '85!
By tomorrow we won't be talking about you for much longer.
"And that gonna make the fucking difference between winning and losing!"
GO BEARS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Well what I'm not going to type is Al Pacino's speech from Any Given Sunday. That would be redundant because somebody, somewhere will have gone to the trouble of sticking it online and now everyone uses that speech to 'fire themselves up' before a big game. I don't. But I don;t play big games, I dominate until the game ain't big. Which is a lie because the only game I've played like a mofo has been Shadow of the Colossus which is brilliant. Killing 200ft monster with a sword using your brain is great unil you reach the last fecker when after many attempts end in ignominious failure you're forced to turn to the FAQ to win the bastard thing thereby turning yourself into a cheat and thus to shake off the horrible feelings that go with being a Grobblelaar you retreat into an introverted coma until shit makes sense and one comes out refreshed and challenged only to see one's Jarl wearing a heavy pewter bear on his head and dressed in Indianapolis blue. Coincidence? I think perhaps. Perhaps he thought like I back last April when thinking about the Superbowl. Have to ask him. He's got a new front door, 600 bearskin, a signed Rangers jersey and everything.
After rereading the above I think it's a great thing that I killed my political aspirations years ago. Imagine this being used against me in a public court. I'd be labelled ignorant by the media and my opponents. The same type of people Rex Grossman labelled ignorant early this week. And he's right. Hence if the media labelled me ignorant does that make me a double twat or reversely-intelligent. Who knows. Who cares. Obviously I do otherwise I'd never have pressed the keys typing it out on a blog for the world to see. But I care about tonight more. The big game.
Obviously I'm going with the Bears. I've got money on them for feck's sake. And I get to pat myself on teh back if the win since I picked this matchup back last April. Of course many things had to happen for this to happen. Colts defence had to rise up, Patriots defence needed to suffer an unprecedented collapse. Yet the Colts are seven points favourite? Vegas like it's punters I feel. Everyone once in a while they'll toss out a line to the knowledgeable ones who don't toss a bet out. Like the year the Rams were 17pt faves over the Pats, and the year the Raiders were faves over the Bucs and the year the line on the Steelers were ridiculously short. I know things. Get money on the Bears.
Things I've learned recently:
Jesus this keyboard is dirty.
Splinter Cell agents can't swim. Seriously. Well they can't in Pandora Tomorrow. All those millions spent on training a super secret agent and the bastard can't swim. Take a bullet yes. But put him near water and he's fucked! I'm not at all bitter about this. No. No. No.
Books you spend years waiting to read really aren't very good.
I like wool.
I suck at Connect 4 but am the shit at Cribbage and Mah Jongg.
Al Gore freaks my arse stupid in the informational sense. (In other words I watched An Inconvenient Truth. It'll happen to you too if you see it by any means necessary)
70's soundtracks from cheap films rule.
Classic Sooty rules. New Sooty will trigger unprecedented obscene use of the obscene c-word.
My next book comes together nicely.
Tricia Helfer wears a wig for Battlestar Galactica. Somehow I've lost respect for the show.
I believe that someday I'll perfect an Idi Amin version of 'Art Star' by the Yeah Yeah Yeahs. My first attempt in the shower this morning was quite corking in my tone deaf ears.
Idi Amin was quite a disturbed c*nt. But for some reason he warms the cockles of my heart.
If my brains were in my arse, I'd speak diarrhoea. So enough foulage, take it away '85!
By tomorrow we won't be talking about you for much longer.
"And that gonna make the fucking difference between winning and losing!"
GO BEARS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
VIEW 5 of 5 COMMENTS
mr_zero:
Dude, They choked.
weirdomanson:
sorry about your boys man! they blew it though. i wanted them to win as well..but they just sucked