argon

i think things are looking up. i've been increadibly introspective these past couple of days and i think its paying off. i dont know that ive come to many solid conclusions, but all the confilict and confusion is getting me somewhere. i dont think that life ever really becomes clear until you royally fuck up and have to spend some time thinking about your priorities. i think its good to make major mistakes sometimes for this very reason. it is both humbling and enlightening. i hope that this past week and a half has accomplished both of these things to some degree. i wont know the full effect of recent events for sometime; its hard not knowing the future. but i hope that it is all for the best. i hope that i do not have many many lonely days ahead of me as a price for a degree of clarity and purpose.