For reasons I will never understand, children and small animals like me.
This weekend I looked after my Nephew and Niece, they turned out to be a lot of fun. Most people, parents in particular, say that childless people like myself get along with children only because they're not ours. There's no bullshit commitment. There might be something to that, but I think I get along with my Nephew and Niece because I don't talk down to them. I'm also rather anti-authoritarian and they dig that too. I guess going over to their house and arguing with their Dad for laughs impresses them. The other thing they like is that I don't yell at them. Except when we're playing Monopoly, which usually degenerates into anarchy. I think the kids and I agree that Adults yell too much. I'm not very fond of most Adults but that's another story.
The Boy, though not necessarily a great athlete, has a knack for basketball that I never had and regularly humiliates me one-on-one. He's a guitar nut, like I was when I was a kid. And he's also very thoughtful, although extremely goofy and prone to dispalys of incredible dorkiness. How in the hell he got elected to vice-president of his fifth grade class is beyond me, but I don't pretend to understand kids these days.
The Girl loves animals and wants to be a veterinarian. I tease her sometimes about her becoming a Model instead. "Models are gay" she always says. Hilarious. She's actually kind of a genius. I taught her how to play chess in an hour, and she beat me. She also understands the finer nuances of poker, how many seven year olds can hang out with you and play poker all night? She makes a good case for reincarnation.
Their Mom and Dad are always trying to fix me up with chicks they work with. I'll have none of it. Russian mail-order brides all the way... As for havin' kids, I think that's out of the question for me; too much chemo and radiation. I think I might be game to adopt a Vietnamese kid someday. I won't have to worry about paying his way through college; he'll figure it out.
This weekend I looked after my Nephew and Niece, they turned out to be a lot of fun. Most people, parents in particular, say that childless people like myself get along with children only because they're not ours. There's no bullshit commitment. There might be something to that, but I think I get along with my Nephew and Niece because I don't talk down to them. I'm also rather anti-authoritarian and they dig that too. I guess going over to their house and arguing with their Dad for laughs impresses them. The other thing they like is that I don't yell at them. Except when we're playing Monopoly, which usually degenerates into anarchy. I think the kids and I agree that Adults yell too much. I'm not very fond of most Adults but that's another story.
The Boy, though not necessarily a great athlete, has a knack for basketball that I never had and regularly humiliates me one-on-one. He's a guitar nut, like I was when I was a kid. And he's also very thoughtful, although extremely goofy and prone to dispalys of incredible dorkiness. How in the hell he got elected to vice-president of his fifth grade class is beyond me, but I don't pretend to understand kids these days.
The Girl loves animals and wants to be a veterinarian. I tease her sometimes about her becoming a Model instead. "Models are gay" she always says. Hilarious. She's actually kind of a genius. I taught her how to play chess in an hour, and she beat me. She also understands the finer nuances of poker, how many seven year olds can hang out with you and play poker all night? She makes a good case for reincarnation.
Their Mom and Dad are always trying to fix me up with chicks they work with. I'll have none of it. Russian mail-order brides all the way... As for havin' kids, I think that's out of the question for me; too much chemo and radiation. I think I might be game to adopt a Vietnamese kid someday. I won't have to worry about paying his way through college; he'll figure it out.
thatwhichisnot:
That's interesting, because I have a similar situation. Kids love me even though I do my best to avoid them. Like your story, I don't talk down to them and I don't yell at them. My personal analysis of the situation is that there are less kids who suck than there are adults who suck. I have definitely met kids who suck, at all ages, but I find adults to be almost universally sickening. What weirds me out is that my misanthropy definitely extends to children, but it's like the don't even care and see right past it. They want to talk to me, they want me to help them put together puzzles. With a small amount of perseverence they always get me to go along with them and we usually have a good time. It's creepy.