apontes29

update time once again........

now my mind is blank and i had so many things to say. darn.

so this is where i am right now. i am on medication. i goto "therapy" once a week. which is good i think. im not to depressed right now. im apathetic. and im trying to not be. but i dont want to slip back into despair. that is so damn easy to do to. today was my day off. i had nothing to do. or i didnt do anything i should have. i called my friend carrie up. no answer. nothing new. i did get in touch with my friend keith who is leaving for costa rica in the morning. crazy. went over to his place for abit and talked about depression. fun stuff. now im back in the basement at my mothers house. called my father up as well today. my brothers are back west visiting and going to bumpershoot tomorrow. cool beans. i hate having days off... or i think i just hate having no life. when i work, at least im somewhere doing something for a good portion of the day. when i dont work i never know what to do. you can only masturbate for so long and heaven knows i have pushed the limits on it this summer. but getting back to the no life thing. i know sitting on my ass in front of the computer all day isnt the healthiest thing to do. but i can only visist the book store so many times in a week... and im truly clueless on what else to do. i will be leaving in 50 days and i am excited about that. but 50 days is enough to go bonkers.. whatever. im done ranting for now i think. tomorrow i work. saturday i have off. i need to find something to do.