aoife

Getting up this morning was VERY hard. My bed is lovely and soft and comfy, and this morning I had company in there...

I went to Savannah with a friend yesterday to get her sleeve worked on, and I really want more tattoos. Like now.

Then after descending into a semi-funk, I met up with the guy for drinks, and we curled up in a corner in the bar to argue sexual politics, talk about rock'n'roll, and cuddle. And since my parents were one-night-only out of town, I had to bring him back to my place.

He looks like he hasn't slept in weeks. He needs a vacation from life. Wish I could kidnap him to NC for a couple of days next week, but he's got daddy duty like 24-7. And big huge knots in his back from the stress of it all. I don't really know him well enough to hear all the baby-mama-drama, but I offered anyway. Gave him a hug and said, "If you ever need to talk..."

He just thanked me, and we went to sleep.

I can't imagine having another little person to revolve my life around. Can't imagine having to make every decision weighing a child's well-being in with my own.

I can never decide if I want to be home for somebody, fall in love and settle down and be comfortable, or if I want first kisses and dancing on bartops and driving out of town at top speed singing along to Bruce Spingsteen. My own fear of committment, really.

A girl that the guy knows said, "I like your girlfriend's shirt" (the I Fucked Mick Jagger shirt) and he didn't contradict her, just introduced me. Ahhh. Girlfriend. I am so not ready to be someone's girlfriend. But at this point, I'd definitely like more than once a week...