Monday May 23, 2005

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Late date tonight. Got to stay up and read the NY Times and hate the world.

I was much happier when I never read the news and had no idea about what went on in the Senate and in other countries. It was probably just as shitty, but I didn't know about it, so I just worried about little things.

I ate too much tonight. I really need to stop that.

I am also reading Emma Forrest's Cherries in the Snow for the I don't know how many-th time. It is both helping me deal with my issues of dating a divorced daddy, and highlighting the things that I do not feel for this guy that I still feel about a certain ex.

At one point she's talking about wanting to be a Springsteenian runaway with someone but realizing that with this guy, she wants to be home. I remember the feeling of not being able to get enough of someone, hating to say goodbye each time, wanting to stay awake and watch them sleep (I know, I'm sappy. shut the fuck up), crawl inside of them and just be there. Holding hands in the car, under the table, just to be touching. Saying "This is what matters" and really meaning it.

I'm a romantic, sure. But I did have that. And I want it again. Or more. I can't settle.
bettietwoguns:
you were in my dream last night. i don't remember much about it, but i think you told me that in college you'd see blondie five nights in a row.

i think in my dream we went to college in the late seventies.

i was remembering all kinds of things from my child hood, like the cardboard containers dannon yogurt used to come in. god i loved those things.

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