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aoife

Hunger City

Member Since 2002

Followers 164 Following 75

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Tuesday Dec 06, 2005

Dec 6, 2005
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I'm thinking of changing my "makes me sad" to "the fact that so many of the lovely ladies on suicidegirls make posts begging for affirmation from their audience."

Not all of them, to be sure. But it feels like an increasing number of posts I read from girls are of some variation on the "I'm not pretty" (pleasetellmeI'mpretty) type. Passive-aggressive fishing for compliments annoys me, and insecurity makes me somehow feel that I shouldn't look at their sets because they give me that creepy feeling that they'll regret them later, once they've gotten/have not gotten the proper affirmation.

I'm obviously not nasty, shallow, or stupid enough to name names. It just seems as though, as the number of SuicideGirls goes up, the vetting process of trying to make sure that the girls are doing it for the right reasons--i.e. that they know they're hot and like showing it off, they get off on other people looking at them naked, etc.--seems to be going down. It brings me back to Ariel Levy's points in
Female Chauvinist Pigs, which I think everyone should read. Is SuicideGirls what it seemed to be at the beginning, a forum for pierced, tattooed, not conventionally beautiful women like the five shown above (whom I think are fucking gorgeous inside and out, BTW) to show themselves off while getting to show off their brains as well, and to get the adoration they (we) deserve, or is it now just another means of gaining acceptance, cred, attention from boys?

As boundcreature put it, is it now just insecurity posing as rebellion? I don't want to think that, but hey. Obviously it means something a bit different to each and every one of the 800-and-some-odd girls on here, but I just feel a bit weird reading journals or group posts complaining of being ugly and then looking at the same girl's naked pictures. If the number of comments on her set didn't make her feel pretty, how are people's messages saying "don't worry, you're pretty!" going to help?
VIEW 15 of 15 COMMENTS
dragod:
My Friend

I almost missed this journal. I was in a real downer,
and then I got sick, and when I came back to this
compromise I have made with the world around me
I laughingly call reality, I saw your words about to leave
my current journals log.

I don't want to ever miss your words because of the brain
inside, and behind them. And beside I have the same
levels of curiosity, both political and culturals as you do.
You are the person to talk about the excesses of boob
talk and the possible invasion of Syria in the same email.

As above I am reminded on once being told by a friend that there was a German school of pyschology that practiced the belief that there are two ur neurotic states
which are universal in our time. One is for woman, the other for man. The woman is afflicted with insecurity; the
male with "the fear of the stranger male." If nothing else
it sounds right for the good old days of living in a cave,
which of course many of us still do in our heads a good deal of the time.

I have certainly noticed the almost correspondence between really great looking women (with whom I have
always had friendships of a special not necessarily sexual
nature, but deep and odd friendships unique as a kind),
and I have always felt this thing that I, she, MUST do
sommething this way for fear of offending ,,,, who.? That
would have to start with Mom and Dad, and the fact that
the attempt never quite suceeded, because it was certainly never about looks to begin with. Looks, however, may have been the form of praise: our pretty
young daughter, right, in a path of destruction connected
to our handsome young son, and off we go into what the
hell does that mean or amount too for the rest of our life.
I don't care. Just keeping telling me that?

Anyway the Pat's are not going to get past the Colts this
year, and there are going to be new teams in the Super
Bowl, but not in the NBA finals. Beside that Over There
worked as a television show, Rome was gorgeously lame,
and I need the name from you again of that Verigo comic
you recently recommended. My pal Carol Tyler got a great review on Time.Com today, so all of us cheering for her were thrilled. My own research into the materials I need to know to complete my next, already advanced, book keeps turning up thrilling stuff, and I am at the door of a
wonderfully innocent and fresh seeming romance by email only of course with this person in France. Too bad my lungs are so shot I have no idea -- fifteen minutes or fifteen years -- how long, or how deeply,I will continue to have this first row seat at this circus.

Good to be in touch with you always,
on these midnight meanderings through the grave yard.

BC

I thought Twwly's journal today was sent from a place
obviously very close to heaven. I loved hearing every word. She is one of my favorites too. As is her dog.
Dec 8, 2005
scott:
i just do what i've always done, stay away from the drama and get out of it what i get out of it.
Dec 8, 2005

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