Heres the situation cut open and raw.
My sobriety has gone completely down the drains...I think about returning to AA because I did like it there, I did like being sober and I did like going...but I've been finding myself forgetting and missing meetings...its kinda silly
I'm an Addict in all sense of the term I am addicted to doing drugs, any and all forms of drugs.
My story is somewhat different...I don't do them because I like too, I often have to give myself pep talks and force myself to do them, because I cringe every time at the thought of another bump of coke, another toke of meth, another puff of weed, another tab of exctasy, another bottle of tussin, another beer...
I do drugs out of the principal...which is shocking as drugs appear to have no value and therefore can offer no principal but this isn't necessarily true, not if your standing where I am.
I see this world all around me, chaotic confused, fucked up, miss managed, abused, corrupt, and dilapidated...and then I hear these "laws","morals","ethics","rules of polite conduct"...and the hypocrisy...just the fucking hypocrisy alone makes me sick...sick to my stomach...
I feel so sick I can't dare to classify myself as the same as these people making the "laws"and upholding "justice"...its wrong...they're holding on to ideas, beliefs, and concepts that hold no value in our modern society. They shake flags of religion, Blair there propaganda and follow in there parents footsteps...
I can't be like them...I can't do what they do...I can't follow there laws...I have to rebel...my life is in the clutches of false happiness and I squeal in the abyss like a trapped pig. To fat and fed just right to escape the pit everyone together, as one, has dug for themselves...
I commit crime to calm the raging tempest building in my heart...To act against the hand that has harmed me...so much so that in all reality the only one I'm harming is me...But I'm no false prophet or martyr begging for death for belief...I'm just an angry, pissed off, frustrated, arrogant, lost kid...
I don't know what else to do...I can't seem to make myself do it...I'm so...distant from everything...When I'm "happy" I feel like something is wrong, like I'm cheating at life. I feel like I'm not doing what I should be doing and that what I am doing is making me miserable...but everyone has been fed the same old bullshit for so long they don't know that everything they believe in is a fraud, that they've been lied to there entire lives...
The saddest thing though, is that they weren't lied to by the government, or any large organization with some sinister plot...they have been lying to each other for so long the thought of it being false is almost unthinkable...so abstract and obscure not many would even know it existed.
The truth of the matter is the lie is what makes me sick. The false belief in a system that doesn't work as well as it should or can and the loss of life and enjoyment resulting from it. That system, that lie is money. That money is a part of living and without it you die! That survival depends upon it.
The worst addiction! Everyone tells you from the day that you can think that you need money to do anything. That life is about money. That you need money to buy a house, support yourself, support your family and be happy!
This lie goes against they very foundation of nature. Obsession occurs
"Something is missing in my life!!! I need something, I need something! Something is very wrong and missing!!! What is it???? What do I need????"
...this feeling of void leads into addiction. Addiction for money,sex,power,drugs,violence, crime, ect..
Our system is very wrong and something MUST be done to fix it...I want to fix it...but it needs to start with Activism!!!!
Apathy, a false belief in security, and selfish gains will never propagate our society into a status of being more than beasts, more than animals. Many people live in poverty, starve, and die of curable diseases and simple medicine.
People ARE animals, we can be trained, we can be taught, we can be obedient. Free will is only for those willing to be free. Leaders, rulers, dictators. As the reigns of the chariot lie dangling upon the ground speeding around the track only those brave enough to reach for them may steer.
Democracy has proven itself as a Failure! Idiots without proper wisdom or education are the ones who determine our leaders? What about in the days of old when Kings were of noble upbringing and given the best education? Would not the wisest leader be the wisest choice? Why are we VOTING!?! What are we voting for, good luck? Maybe we'll pick the candidate that lied the least to us???? Thats ridiculous!
Think for a moment, how great can a country truly be when the elected cannot be trusted?
When leaders are made through manipulation and amiability while logic, wisdom, education sit ideally by never to be seen.
We Need Kings and dictators! Life-time devoted servants to the People! Raised from birth to Lead our country! What experience can an elected official learn to become a great leader? Class President????
There are no classes offered on "Leading a Country" there are no tests or wisdom to be passed on from one ruler to another. There is no stability in our strength or power as a nation!
One 4 year period our economy maybe booming! Then for 8 years it declines! Gambling on a chance to elect a good leader will never be a staple of a great nation! This idea of freedom is peon middle-class nonsense. There is no wall that cannot be passed.
Hippies with there gentle dreams of utopia removing themselves from reality...deluding there minds with drugs...
We live in a real world with a real system of mechanics. Once we have established rules to a system we may begin to bend and bind them together to create with our minds the design of the future. I am no dreamer, these are merely memories of the realizations that are to come, again.
Victory to the New Empire!
Democracy is Dead!
My sobriety has gone completely down the drains...I think about returning to AA because I did like it there, I did like being sober and I did like going...but I've been finding myself forgetting and missing meetings...its kinda silly
I'm an Addict in all sense of the term I am addicted to doing drugs, any and all forms of drugs.
My story is somewhat different...I don't do them because I like too, I often have to give myself pep talks and force myself to do them, because I cringe every time at the thought of another bump of coke, another toke of meth, another puff of weed, another tab of exctasy, another bottle of tussin, another beer...
I do drugs out of the principal...which is shocking as drugs appear to have no value and therefore can offer no principal but this isn't necessarily true, not if your standing where I am.
I see this world all around me, chaotic confused, fucked up, miss managed, abused, corrupt, and dilapidated...and then I hear these "laws","morals","ethics","rules of polite conduct"...and the hypocrisy...just the fucking hypocrisy alone makes me sick...sick to my stomach...
I feel so sick I can't dare to classify myself as the same as these people making the "laws"and upholding "justice"...its wrong...they're holding on to ideas, beliefs, and concepts that hold no value in our modern society. They shake flags of religion, Blair there propaganda and follow in there parents footsteps...
I can't be like them...I can't do what they do...I can't follow there laws...I have to rebel...my life is in the clutches of false happiness and I squeal in the abyss like a trapped pig. To fat and fed just right to escape the pit everyone together, as one, has dug for themselves...
I commit crime to calm the raging tempest building in my heart...To act against the hand that has harmed me...so much so that in all reality the only one I'm harming is me...But I'm no false prophet or martyr begging for death for belief...I'm just an angry, pissed off, frustrated, arrogant, lost kid...
I don't know what else to do...I can't seem to make myself do it...I'm so...distant from everything...When I'm "happy" I feel like something is wrong, like I'm cheating at life. I feel like I'm not doing what I should be doing and that what I am doing is making me miserable...but everyone has been fed the same old bullshit for so long they don't know that everything they believe in is a fraud, that they've been lied to there entire lives...
The saddest thing though, is that they weren't lied to by the government, or any large organization with some sinister plot...they have been lying to each other for so long the thought of it being false is almost unthinkable...so abstract and obscure not many would even know it existed.
The truth of the matter is the lie is what makes me sick. The false belief in a system that doesn't work as well as it should or can and the loss of life and enjoyment resulting from it. That system, that lie is money. That money is a part of living and without it you die! That survival depends upon it.
The worst addiction! Everyone tells you from the day that you can think that you need money to do anything. That life is about money. That you need money to buy a house, support yourself, support your family and be happy!
This lie goes against they very foundation of nature. Obsession occurs
"Something is missing in my life!!! I need something, I need something! Something is very wrong and missing!!! What is it???? What do I need????"
...this feeling of void leads into addiction. Addiction for money,sex,power,drugs,violence, crime, ect..
Our system is very wrong and something MUST be done to fix it...I want to fix it...but it needs to start with Activism!!!!
Apathy, a false belief in security, and selfish gains will never propagate our society into a status of being more than beasts, more than animals. Many people live in poverty, starve, and die of curable diseases and simple medicine.
People ARE animals, we can be trained, we can be taught, we can be obedient. Free will is only for those willing to be free. Leaders, rulers, dictators. As the reigns of the chariot lie dangling upon the ground speeding around the track only those brave enough to reach for them may steer.
Democracy has proven itself as a Failure! Idiots without proper wisdom or education are the ones who determine our leaders? What about in the days of old when Kings were of noble upbringing and given the best education? Would not the wisest leader be the wisest choice? Why are we VOTING!?! What are we voting for, good luck? Maybe we'll pick the candidate that lied the least to us???? Thats ridiculous!
Think for a moment, how great can a country truly be when the elected cannot be trusted?
When leaders are made through manipulation and amiability while logic, wisdom, education sit ideally by never to be seen.
We Need Kings and dictators! Life-time devoted servants to the People! Raised from birth to Lead our country! What experience can an elected official learn to become a great leader? Class President????
There are no classes offered on "Leading a Country" there are no tests or wisdom to be passed on from one ruler to another. There is no stability in our strength or power as a nation!
One 4 year period our economy maybe booming! Then for 8 years it declines! Gambling on a chance to elect a good leader will never be a staple of a great nation! This idea of freedom is peon middle-class nonsense. There is no wall that cannot be passed.
Hippies with there gentle dreams of utopia removing themselves from reality...deluding there minds with drugs...
We live in a real world with a real system of mechanics. Once we have established rules to a system we may begin to bend and bind them together to create with our minds the design of the future. I am no dreamer, these are merely memories of the realizations that are to come, again.
Victory to the New Empire!
Democracy is Dead!