antiprincess

My mom and I kind of got into an argument/discussion last weekend where she sent me an e-mail that really upset me, and where she said somethings that were uninformed, entirely inaccurate and some that were even childish. I replied with what I felt was a very calm, non-confrontational e-mail that I still felt got across my point well. A lot of "I feel______when you______," kind of statements. She replied with a sort of underhanded apology, I didn't reply (I was out), she replied again with a slightly more sincere apology, I replied with more "I feels" because I didn't think she really understood how/why she was hurting me, and where I was coming from. No reply. For five days. No phone calls, no e-mails, no IMs, nothing. Which, from my mom, is unreal. I don't know that I've ever gone that long without her calling me. I was actually starting to stress me out, although, in general, I'd prefer she call less.

All week, I'm trying to figure out what's going through her head. Option 1) I've somehow inadvertently offended her in my last letter, and she's angry at me. Option 2) My letter was so mature and well though out, she's angry at me for being so calm while she was being childish. Option 3) She realizes how out of turn and intentionally hurtful some of her later remarks were (I told her it hurts me when she talks shit about my dead grandpa. In her reply, she says sorry, but..,goes on to say the worst shit about him I've ever heard..."I'll never do it again." :whatever and is a little ashamed and embarrassed.

Today I received my first e-mail from her all week. "Do you still love me? I love you and miss you very much." The shift in the balance of power is almost tangible. I replied back that of course I love her, I'll always love her, etc., etc.

I don't know that I've ever really won an argument with my mother. Even when I was so right it was ludicrous. This counts as a win, right?