antipode3141592

I lie.
I "forget".
I lay in bed,
indulging in unreality,
hiding from the truth,
hiding from my friends and loved ones.
I've been running from it all,
and I ache all over...
all I can think of
is how I want to be with you.
so many hopes,
dreams,
and goals
that fade into so much nothing.
why have I lost my will?
where did I lose my way?
I just want to be whole again.
again?
maybe I was never whole,
and all this time
I have been falling apart
and now the pieces
have been scattered in the wind.
I just want to stop avoiding others.
I want to stop hurting people.
I want to be alive.
I want to be whole
so that someday I can be
with you.