antihero43

5 hours of sleep. Bladder woke me up, racing thoughts are keeping me awake. I cant stop thinking about being broke, the bills i have to pay, and the job i dont have. The very start of this year was cool, free champagne at a bar, good looking lady nearly 10 years older than me gave me a kiss, singing good tunes. Never been this...
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So im still alive, which means the magic mushrooms i took last night were not the kind that can kill you after you see some shit. I havent taken those beautiful little stems and caps in over a year and a half, and honestly i dont know why. Sadly though, now im out and i need more. You would think living in Oregon i could...
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I TELL YOU I CANT CONTAIN MY INSIDES!!!!! I feel like i cant breath and then i realize its because im holding my breath! THIS IS NOT PHILOSOPHY! It is the beautiful effects of psychedelics! Im sitting on my chair, in my super super soft loving hoodie that i got for christmas, not wanting to step off. I wish there was someone here to be...
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Alright i guesssss its time for an update lol. Well as of midnight saturday morning, i am out of the Navy. I love being in the military, but the navy and i had our disagreements and we parted ways. I feel like i got the better end of the deal thought, all they got from me was some blood and small amount of cheap labor....
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I have been gone for way too long. Well not too far gone, i still have been lurking in the shadows, staring at all you beautiful naked women.
Im a fuck up, plain and simple. I fuck up my money by getting too drunk too often. I fuck up my relationships by closing my self off emotionally when i feel like im getting to close....
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OK so lets see if it will work today. Its monday, which means its a school night. Im a night student in the US Navy, its kinda shitty. Pretty much all i do is go to school, go to the gym, and sleep. I guess i cant complain too much except im training in a field that i have no interest in. Sure it will...
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so retarded, i tried posting a blog, and it didnt go through and then it all got lost. Maybe ill type it all again later, for now this is a place holder.

HAHAHAHAHA IM BACK!!!!! Well i have internet atleast. Not all the time, but most days. Hopefully ill get put into a barraks soon that has internet in the rooms, but for now i have to go to common areas on base. Im here for school, and i might be here for a long time from what i hear. Not a bad location to be though,...
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5 more full days including today since its only 11:18 am. But i guess technically the days is nearly half over, so 4.5 days left? Its weird knowing that after the 23rd, the only time ill sleep in my own bed again will be on the random visits home. I have lived away from home before but still within the state and only for college....
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6 The number of shifts i have left at the job i kinda hate but have been thankful to have.
15 The number of nights left sleeping in my own bed.
16 The number of days left until I move on to a new way of life, a new beginning.
9 The number of weeks in Basic Training
2 Approximate number of years ill be...
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