anticus

My first day of therapy today. I think I overwhelmed the poor fucker. He's a student - not a PhD.

Pretty much all he said was "Wow. I imagine you feel horrible about this" and "You took a step by coming here."

I cried the whole time.

I have been uncomfortable sleeping on my side of the bed without her there - and uncomfortable sleeping on her side. She and I rearranged my bedroom together in August. So, I just moved the whole damn bed back to where it was before. We'll see if that helps.

I am angry that she never put any effort into the relationship. After watching The Graduate, she asked me if I would fight for her - if I would stop her wedding like Dustin Hoffman. I told her no. If she didn't want to be with me enough to marry another man, then why should I bother?

But I did fight for her - I gave her lots of chances - and she just took advantage of me.

EVERYONE is telling me to let her go. LET HER GO.

I so want to.

Tomorrow I will write a positve entry. I promise.