Hmm. I just spent the last hour reviewing the last five years of my life via this journal. Consensus: I don't drink as much as I used to (more's the pity), I still use nerdy akward phrases like, "more's the pity," and I spend a lot of time lusting after women and being in bad relationships with men. On the upside, I seem to have achieved my goal of being independent... I have a beautiful little apartment all to myself and I have a challenging, rewarding, steady, well paying job. Downside - all this is occurring in Reading, all of the people I know and love are out toward Philly (or in Oregon + NH). So I feel like a bona fide grown up for the moment, but faced with the extra challenge of finding something to do and ways to meet new people in Reading area, when I wasn't very good at doing that in Philly.
I am. Not unhappy. Not entirely content. Treading water, which is character building, or some bullshit. The plan now is to work in Reading for three years, get loan forgiveness/tuition reimbursement from the hospital while I earn my BSN, then move to Oregon.
Always with the next goal in mind, thinking my life will start then. Well, at least I'm achieving the goals, with or without a life.
/is content after all.
I am. Not unhappy. Not entirely content. Treading water, which is character building, or some bullshit. The plan now is to work in Reading for three years, get loan forgiveness/tuition reimbursement from the hospital while I earn my BSN, then move to Oregon.
Always with the next goal in mind, thinking my life will start then. Well, at least I'm achieving the goals, with or without a life.
/is content after all.
Thursday
JULY 22, 2004 @ 09:35 PM
Ever have those times when you can't look in the mirror, because you know who you are, and catching a glimpse of that stranger will throw everything out of balance again...
VIEW 3 of 3 COMMENTS
Always great to have new friends. I believe we spoke ( or wrote) a while back, when you were still in K of P. I think I told you I lived in Beaverton for a couple years and my ex inlaws lived in Lake Oswego.
I like your description of ' just treading water'. It sound a lot like me. Because I live in chronic pain, my goals are limited to short term.....like making it through the day without slamming my head into a wall.
OK, I'm starting to babble on.......
Have a fun day !