angrymeat

Well I am in a much better mood today . I have had to spend a good part of my morning dealing with the coworkers computer but took it much better today than I did yesterday. Me and my boss/friend were talking yesterday and the subject of what makes you a man came up. Now I will say up front debating manhood is like debating religion. No one is right you will never win this battle. My boss asked me yesterday what i thought made me a man . My reply was my son . He of course came back with all this stuff about guys without kids are not men then blah blah blah. No this is not what I meant . I say my son however it is kind of a bunch of rthings rolled into one. I am goign to share this with you now I think I am a man because I love my son with all my heart and I put his life above all other. I am a man because I care so deeply what happens to him and I do everything in my power regardless of what I want to do to assure he has every chance possible in life and does not struggle. Ther eis alot more to it but I am having trouble putting it to words . I think too men "men" get caught up in this tv image that they cannot be sensitive or let there feelings show . That never made any sense to me . My father was never one to show much emotion except anger. Now I dont want you to get the wrong idea he was not an angry man but he just had two distinct faces the normal and the mad. I have only seen my father cry once and that was when his brother died. I have only seen my father get violent however once and that was when a man put his finger in my mothers face and yelled at her. My father and I did not get along when I was growing up. I hated him in fact sometimes because he would never say he was sorry and he would never tell me he loved me . One of the things I have learned since having Avery is that my father told me he loved me every day. He told me he loved me by being there, by taking care of me , by raising me , by telling me who not to hang out with and by grounding my ass every time I stepped out of lines or my grades slipped. I am not sure if there is much point to this post except call you fathers and tell them you love them give them a big hug when you see them your mothers too . I am sure alot of people had very different childhoods but just make sure if you dont get along with them now that it is for a good reason and not petty misunderstanding. well thats enough sharing for today . Jeez these things turn out to be novels . Granted I will say very sloppy poorly punctuated and severly misspelled novels . hope everyone is having a nice day.