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angelfrost

Richmond, VA

Member Since 2002

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Friday Feb 20, 2004

Feb 20, 2004
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Working at Kinko's I find that there are two types of people in this world.

Type 1 : People who are smart enough to run a copy machine.
Type 2 : People who are not smart enough to run a copy machine.

If people only came to grasp this and internalize the ramifications, the world would be a much more enlightened place. The Type 1 people could assume their rightful place at the head of society and culture, and the Type 2 people could be systematically sterilized to avoid contributing their clearly inferior DNA to the global gene pool.

Some have argued that reducing the entire world into two working categories of this kind oversimplifies a complex reality. After three years at Kinko's I've come to realize they are correct. There are in fact two sub-branches of each Type, as illustrated below.

Type 1a : (Type 1 who knows it) I've got it, Thanks!
Type 1b : (Type 1 and denies it) Oh, I have a physics degree but I don't know how to run a copier, can you help me?

Type 2a : (Type 2 who knows it) Oh my god I'm so stupid with these things, can you help me?
Type 2b : (Type 2 and denies it) Your copy machine is broken!

It is important not to take this last statement from a Type 2b person literally, it does not indicate the status of the machine. Not EVER. What this statement really means is I'm too stupid to run a copy machine, this fills me with shame and self loathing, I will blame your copy machine and vindicate myself and pretend to be a Type 1a person, despite my clearly Type 2b capacity and attitude.

Truly, self awareness of your Type is critical in solving the problems of your life.

Perhaps this is the solution to our broken democratic system Just imagine all the politicians coming to the staggering realiztion; Oh my God! What am I doing running a country? I'm not even smart enough to run a copy machine! with this epiphany they transcend their previous Type 2b status and are elevated to the more self-aware Type 2a.

This truth could free a generation of stagnating youths, stuck in dead end jobs, or dead end lives, they would come to vigorous life with the reality of the sitatuation. I don't have to settle for this! they'd say, I'm smart enough to run a copy machine! Why the hell am I working at Burger King and getting stoned every weekend?

Liberation is at hand. Viva le Xerox.
VIEW 3 of 3 COMMENTS
maelphaedor:
Given the job that Shadow and I both have right now,
we can so TOTALLY relate to your post. Just ask him
about how he feels about people that get an alarm
system installed in their home and then have ZERO
clue about how it works. Somedays I've almost been
to the point of answering "magic alarm fairies make the
alarm work, sir" *click*. smile
Feb 20, 2004
sinope:
Hey,

Just a thought......there are of course those people perfectly capable of using the copier, until they see the hottie behind the desk. I define these as type 1(c) denies in hope of a quick fumble hoping feigned stupidity will gain them a life partner.
Dude, this is well worth turning into a book "The Anthropology of Kinko's: Love, Life and the Xerox Machine"......hmmm ok maybe thats going a bit far biggrin

Sin xx
Feb 21, 2004

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