anchorpersonontv

Life went up, and then life came back down again.

So, I kind of experienced a love at first sight thing a couple weeks back. Strange thing is, it was with a girl I've known for almost a year now.

I guess I just have my own definition of "sight" going on with that.


So, anyway, I fell for this girl and everything was grand, because she actually fell for me too. I knew her from a class we had together for the first semester, and I always thought she was pretty cool... but then I went to a friend of her's party, and I saw her in a different way for the first time. I fell for her hard, and it confused the shit out of me. Uncharacteristically of me, I asked her out within the week, on my last day of high school, right outside the building in the grass. We kissed a few times shyly, then I told her I liked her and (somewhat nervously) asked her to go out with me. She said yes and then we kissed passionately for a moment. Then, we went back inside holding hands and whatnot while I tried not to grin like an idiot.

So, everything was great. I continued to fall for her. The strangest thing was how comfortable she made me feel. We talked on the phone for hours every night, and within a few days I told her all of my deepest, darkest secrets. Stuff it took me, like, a year to tell my ex and whatnot.

So, yeah, I pretty much started to fall in love with this girl by the time we were dating for a week...

Problem was, she started to fall in love with me.

This, because of her past experiences, etc, caused her to become terrified... So she dumped me.

She dumped me to stop herself from loving me.

So, I'm in an incredibly confusing place right now. We still talk a lot... We basically talk like a couple. I told her everything I could think of to try to convince her that she didn't need to go through the things she has to go through alone, but she had already made up her mind.

I'm confused as hell, because she keeps saying "for now" etc... But I'm leaving for Chicago in two months.

Which itself is another problem... In more ways than one.





More later.