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anaxarete

gotham

Member Since 2006

Followers 115 Following 229

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Monday Feb 13, 2006

Feb 13, 2006
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I never was good at keeping journals. Im fairly consistent in the beginning and trail off quickly. plus I keep thinking I want to write something really clever and with that kind of pressure Ill never write.
Ive been transferring old video to dvd for posterity, which is a good exercise but really exacerbates the 'oh my god Im so old and what have I done with my life' feeling Ive been having for the past month. Usually I feel that where ever I am in my life is the best place Ive ever been, Im terminally optimistic, but not lately.

here's me at 14, or maybe its 15
I was married a mere 3 years later, its crazy.
You cant tell in this picture of course, it may have been before my first crew cut or bleach job, but I was also very angry. I wanted to be tough. I was angry. I wanted to get in fights, go out with boys who were destined to go to jail. Like the movie Over the Edge or if thats too far back for you, the Judd Nelson character in The Breakfast Club. Thats not literal its an approximation.. I liked punk rock boys and The Exploited (I had terrible taste in punk rock music).
That was what I wished I were. In reality most of the fights I picked were with boys I really wanted to fuck. I was picked up by the police only once.
Aaahhhh, I remember now.
I was 14. I took out my parents car and totally wrecked it. I flipped it as a matter of fact. And then I was grounded for a year. This was during that summer. I cant believe I forgot that.


Hope everyone here in NYC enjoyed the snow. I was a hermit yesterday. Didnt go outside at all. Watched it through the window and drank tea. The day cried out for tea.
Now back to my ethics homework and willing myself into a good mood. Think thatll work? What do you do when the good mood just wont come?
VIEW 9 of 9 COMMENTS
maxk:
Cute pic!

They decided to close the store yesterday, right after she got in! It was a good thing I decided to turn back. I would have gone in for nothing! Always trust your instincts!
Feb 13, 2006
kandice:
Honestly, I HATE the snow here. It is disgusting. Sigh. frown

But hey, thanks for the compliment! Im going to do a set eventually, I just have to wait on my post-surgery swelling to go down on my abdomen.

And wow, thank you OH SO MUCH for all the lingerie links! Im going to go through them all tonight and hopefully spend every last penny I have.. hahaha.

take care doll!
<3333 kandice
Feb 13, 2006

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