I used bitch about "the scene" pretty often. I'll admit. I liked to play the role of the old jaded scenester and whine about all of the good bands signing to major record labels, and how there are too many "little kids" at "my" shows and stuff like that. I would like to think I've calmed down a lot since my first couple years in college. I'll still complain when I go to shows that its different. It isn't that I got old, at least not completly the scene changed. But, I suppose, scenes do that.

I just went to Rilo Kiley's myspace page to hear the song from their new album. I tried to watch the video, but couldn't finish it. It was so bad I couldn't finish it. It was just another generic major label (apparently they signed to Warner Brothers, how nice for them) "indie/garage" song. They look just like all of those other bands.

This kind of thing happens a lot, I guess. And this time it isn't as bad as when it happened with Boysetsfire, but still...it makes me feel just like that (not so) old jaded scenester kid who talked shit on the same pop-punk bands he liked six months prior, and called all of the youngsters posers. Except now I'm older. Oh, and I don't have a microphone that gave me some kind of false sense of justification (see: "I do college radio, and my best friend works in an indie record store, so my opinion matters more than yours.")

I hate music as much as I love it sometimes. I guess that's the whole point, though. In highschool I was the kid with the headphones glued to his ears. I remember a kid in my drama class (who was taking it just to fill out his schedule and get his art credit) asking me once, "how can you listen to music so much? I only listen to CDs when I'm in my car." I remeber feeling shocked. Shocked and sad. Music had such a profound effect on my daily life, and at the time I couldn't fathom how other people didn't have that same way of enjoying music. I can safely assume that kid had never been to see a live show. That makes me feel even sadder for him.

But, I suppose in order to have such a profound love for something, means taking the good with the bad. Even if sometimes it pisses you off.