Okay. Now I have something to say, and it is something I am a little embarrassed to admit. I am envious. Very, very envious. A research student from my department has been accepted into a very prestigious university in the UK to do a D.Phil (that should probably give it away...). In fact, this school is one of my two dream schools (the other is in the US, and, although it isn't as high on the Times Higher Education list as some other schools, there is just something about it that makes me weak at the knees.)
And... it is strange to me, because I'm not envious of the opportunity this girl has been provided, or of the academics she will get a chance to work with or any of that. And, I'm not in a position to be able to leave where I am (being, mainly, that as someone in a long term relationship, you can't just think about yourself in these kinds of situations). Also, its not as though my school is NOT a good school (in fact, it is top 50 on the THE list as well...). It is mainly that I cannot believe it because I have no respect for this girls research.
Its not that I don't find it interesting (which I don't, but that is kind of incidental), but I actually think that it is not really worth doing in this particular field and I think it is a bit "sensationalist" and just... I just don't respect it and I don't see that it has any worth to my particular field of study. I mean, there are other projects that are going on that I am personally not interested in, and I wouldn't choose to undertake, but I can see worth in them and I can understand why they are being undertaken. Not this one. I just don't get it.
I wouldn't trade my situation for her's. I wouldn't give up the life that I have, and I am in a position where there is no way that I could ask my partner to give up his life as well. It has been hard for him to get accepted into uni, and he's just started first year (after recently getting out of the military) and his dream of getting his own degree.
I also feel like this particular school has been a little bit tainted. Obviously, there is someone out there who does think that her research is worth doing, and probably someone who has a little bit more of an idea that I do, but still...
Also, as someone who does not have a master's degree (and, at least until I've finished my PhD, have no intention of even thinking about getting one) it would be very, very difficult (not impossible, but hard) for me to get into this school - and it is also not like I have even tried. Maybe in a year or so I will sit down with S and think about both of us moving (although, at this stage it would be more likely for him to want to transfer to the US, which is totally fair enough - although, easier for us to move to the UK).
Grr... I really don't like being that person. And - as such. I am going to actively attempt to NOT. The opportunities I have here (teaching, research, ability to go straight into PhD, supervisor I work very well with, young and fresh department et. al.) outweigh (at the moment) what I would possibly lose.
I just don't want to be stuck at my school forever. I don't want to be the academic who gets all their degrees from the same place, moves into an assistant lecturing position there, never leaves and ends up running the department and never really publishing anything of worth. I think that is what I am most worried about.
And... it is strange to me, because I'm not envious of the opportunity this girl has been provided, or of the academics she will get a chance to work with or any of that. And, I'm not in a position to be able to leave where I am (being, mainly, that as someone in a long term relationship, you can't just think about yourself in these kinds of situations). Also, its not as though my school is NOT a good school (in fact, it is top 50 on the THE list as well...). It is mainly that I cannot believe it because I have no respect for this girls research.
Its not that I don't find it interesting (which I don't, but that is kind of incidental), but I actually think that it is not really worth doing in this particular field and I think it is a bit "sensationalist" and just... I just don't respect it and I don't see that it has any worth to my particular field of study. I mean, there are other projects that are going on that I am personally not interested in, and I wouldn't choose to undertake, but I can see worth in them and I can understand why they are being undertaken. Not this one. I just don't get it.
I wouldn't trade my situation for her's. I wouldn't give up the life that I have, and I am in a position where there is no way that I could ask my partner to give up his life as well. It has been hard for him to get accepted into uni, and he's just started first year (after recently getting out of the military) and his dream of getting his own degree.
I also feel like this particular school has been a little bit tainted. Obviously, there is someone out there who does think that her research is worth doing, and probably someone who has a little bit more of an idea that I do, but still...
Also, as someone who does not have a master's degree (and, at least until I've finished my PhD, have no intention of even thinking about getting one) it would be very, very difficult (not impossible, but hard) for me to get into this school - and it is also not like I have even tried. Maybe in a year or so I will sit down with S and think about both of us moving (although, at this stage it would be more likely for him to want to transfer to the US, which is totally fair enough - although, easier for us to move to the UK).
Grr... I really don't like being that person. And - as such. I am going to actively attempt to NOT. The opportunities I have here (teaching, research, ability to go straight into PhD, supervisor I work very well with, young and fresh department et. al.) outweigh (at the moment) what I would possibly lose.
I just don't want to be stuck at my school forever. I don't want to be the academic who gets all their degrees from the same place, moves into an assistant lecturing position there, never leaves and ends up running the department and never really publishing anything of worth. I think that is what I am most worried about.