amelie

Dear god....sooo, here I am once again, too intoxicated for my own good, but somehow that never seems to stop me from drinking more. I'm extremely unhappy with people, everyone that I know fucking sucks. Everyone is selfish, everyone would fuck their friends significant others if they had the chance. It's fucking depressing, the show that people put on so that you think they are decent, when in all reality they would probably fuck you over in a second if it served them well. I'm feeling very negative and cynical, I don't know. I've been realizing lately how little I really trust people, and how few and precious the people are that I do completely trust.

As silly as it sounds, I don't trust women because I always feel like they are going to force, in one way or another, the men that I love out of my life. This is definitlely something that goes back to childhood experiences, blah blah fucking blah... and I don't trust men because they always drop me for other women. Ugh, that sounds so horrible when I read it back to myself I wish that I felt differently about this..sometimes I do, I 'm just in one of those moods...Anyhoo,...fuck it...