ambersaurus

THEY'RE FINALLY FIXING THE LEAK IN MY CEILING. THEY'RE DOING IT RIGHT NOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH SO HAPPY!!!!!!!!!!!!! NO MORE WATER WAKING ME UP!!!!!!!!!!! NO MORE PLASTER FALLING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! no more 7 FOOT HOLE IN THE CEILING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!I CAN MOVE ALL OF MY SHIT BACK INTO MY ROOM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! HOORAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

that's all. In case that didn't make you as happy or excited as it made me, here's a joke:

Two old ladies were outside their nursing home, having a smoke, when it started to rain. One of the ladies pulled out a condom, cut off the end and put it over her cigarette, and continued smoking.

Lady 1: What's that?
Lady 2: A condom. This way my cigarette doesn't get wet.
Lady 1: Where did you get it?
Lady 2: You can get them at any drugstore.

The next day, Lady 1 hobbles herself into the local drugstore and announces to the pharmacist that she wants a box of condoms.

The guy, obviously embarrassed, looks at her kind of strangely she is, after all, over 80 years of age, but very delicately asks what brand she prefers.

Lady 1: Doesn't matter son, as long as it fits a Camel.

The pharmacist fainted.