I am officially not allowed to drink tequila anymore. Patricks orders.
Last night I got a talking to about my drunken behavior and how my "tough girl" side needs to take a hiatus....permanently. According to reports I spent 30 minutes ranting about some guy dancing to really bad electronic music and how I wanted to kick him over a railing. I kept asking for permission to do so, in this form..
"baby, please let me do it. please? just one kick."
Needless to say, my old man is not too fond of girls fighting (especially when one of them is who he loves), and thats been a huge problem of mine since I was a little kid. I've always been the scrappy badass that handles everything with her fists... "but we're adults now"... I grew up as a hardcore kid in the 90's. It was all fighting under the POSI guise, and I am finding that habit hard to break. I genuinely think this will be an issue for me. Especially if im drinking... I have no filter on my mouth, and I tend to come off rather crass at times. I have a hard time keeping my mouth shut, and am very stubborn and opinionated. There's few things I come to blows over, but when I do...it's usually a shitstorm, and I end up getting whisked away out a backdoor before the cops come. The last thing I want to do is embarrass the love of my life, so I am making a vow to myself at this moment that I will start walking away. Ugh. It sucks saying this at all, but im nervous.
Im really grateful to have such an understanding man in my life. He knows where im coming from, and genuinely tries to talk to me calmly and with patience even when my instinct is to stop listening... I am truly blessed, and its for him that I am going to start carrying myself with a bit more honor and respect. I used to think the idea of me being sucha hardass got me honor...but now I see it was for the wrong reasons.
Okay,
This vent is officially over. and the issue is squashed. Just wanted to let some of that out.
And scene.
Michael Mcdonald is in 7 days. God Bless America.
Last night I got a talking to about my drunken behavior and how my "tough girl" side needs to take a hiatus....permanently. According to reports I spent 30 minutes ranting about some guy dancing to really bad electronic music and how I wanted to kick him over a railing. I kept asking for permission to do so, in this form..
"baby, please let me do it. please? just one kick."
Needless to say, my old man is not too fond of girls fighting (especially when one of them is who he loves), and thats been a huge problem of mine since I was a little kid. I've always been the scrappy badass that handles everything with her fists... "but we're adults now"... I grew up as a hardcore kid in the 90's. It was all fighting under the POSI guise, and I am finding that habit hard to break. I genuinely think this will be an issue for me. Especially if im drinking... I have no filter on my mouth, and I tend to come off rather crass at times. I have a hard time keeping my mouth shut, and am very stubborn and opinionated. There's few things I come to blows over, but when I do...it's usually a shitstorm, and I end up getting whisked away out a backdoor before the cops come. The last thing I want to do is embarrass the love of my life, so I am making a vow to myself at this moment that I will start walking away. Ugh. It sucks saying this at all, but im nervous.
Im really grateful to have such an understanding man in my life. He knows where im coming from, and genuinely tries to talk to me calmly and with patience even when my instinct is to stop listening... I am truly blessed, and its for him that I am going to start carrying myself with a bit more honor and respect. I used to think the idea of me being sucha hardass got me honor...but now I see it was for the wrong reasons.
Okay,
This vent is officially over. and the issue is squashed. Just wanted to let some of that out.
And scene.
Michael Mcdonald is in 7 days. God Bless America.
VIEW 9 of 9 COMMENTS
annisa:
you quoted Deadwood in someone's blog and I fell in love with you
jerky:
Amber has a nasty right hook, ask me how I know.