I'm living two lives in two time zones these days: one of me is eighteen, courageous, gorgeous, working hard to meet ends, living in Missoula, Montana; the other lies in his tub for hours trying to simulate his birth, breathing through a straw so his entire body is submerged, and then jumping out screaming, slipping, and hitting his head on the toilet seat. The unconscious one has a dream that he is masturbating and wakes up masturbating. He mumbles something like words and seems somewhat alive. After crawling out from behind the toilet, this one of me drapes himself over the edge of the tub and practices breathing underwater.
