alohajames

Working towards extinction

That phrase sums up my life at the moment.
Every day for the past few months has been without purpose. I've been enjoying life, but I've been having this feeling like I'm being hollowed out from the inside. Like every action I make has no affect on anything. Neither positive or negative.

I am decision neutral, it wouldn't matter what I did, it would be to no purpose.

I believe I know what my purpose is, the only issue is it is currently impossible as it requires someone that will not allow me into her life. Being around her is the only time that I feel whole and happy, like I have a purpose and it's to help her through her journey in life.

I'm lost, I'm always without energy unless I'm at work and that's just because I'm distracted from normal life. But if there's ever a slow moment then I'm screwed.

If any of you are ever in the Des Moines area and feel like kicking me in the face to liven my day just let me know, I'll happily oblige.

Humbly,



James