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allegro

NYC

Member Since 2007

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Monday Jun 20, 2011

Jun 20, 2011
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My dad, via email, outed me as bisexual (or more specifically that I nearly married a woman) to a friend of family as a way of demonstrating his superior morals, here via acceptance of his child.

He also mentioned that he thinks we're all built heterosexual. Also got around to belittling the beginning of his relationship with my mother AGAIN in favor of his devoted passion for some girl in college who, as I've heard, didn't like him, and as he pointed out, turned out not only to be lesbian, but a author on GLBT issues. Keep in mind, my mother has supported my out of work father entirely for over a decade while he spends her out of house and home, first with music and movies, now with music, movies, and medication.

I'm proud of my sexual identity. Still, it ain't his to share. Outing is never cool. In this case, to someone I'll be sitting next to at a wedding in a month, only to surely hear some nicer version of "well at least you got better."

He knows that there were people in my family I didn't tell about my last girlfriend before we broke up because it would increase family tensions and I wanted to be sure that both of my parents were prepared for the likely fallout. Now I don't know what feels worse - the thoughtless betrayal of a trust, or the fact I didn't come out to more of my extended family. I wanted to. I thought I was being considerate. Was I wrong? Or am I focusing on the wrong issue here? Then it's all about being angry at my dad again. Hold on, dad, what do you mean, we're all built straight?

I know he's cut down on his anti-psychotics, and his writing (down to sentence structure) suggests things are getting bad again. I'm worried, but as he's proven time and again, there's nothing I can do to help him. And as usual, I can't get him to get his selfish head head out of his selfish ass and see that he made a mistake.

I can't believe this man is going to give a toast at my wedding.


Ok, sad angry rant done.


Love to you...
VIEW 5 of 5 COMMENTS
grayness:
I can sympathize.

It's not nice... but often I am glad my father is no longer around. Always, really.
Jun 21, 2011
longlostsapper:
Good luck hope it all goes well
Jun 24, 2011

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