allegro

I don't like crying like I did this morning.
I've ever liked how much I cry, but this was excessive. Not that is was unwarranted, some excessive emotional display was called for, but if I had access to it anger would have been the one to choose.

He aggravates me so much sometimes.

I remember that he supports me both emotionally and monetarily. That doesn't change. I resent the fact that I am in a position to need the financial support cause it affects my ability to approach the relationship as equals. The notion I couldn't support myself without him is VERY stressful for me. I can't make the honest choice that this is where I want to be every day that way I used to, cause it's where I have to be. It doesn't matter that this is where I would be anyway. The notion of no option makes the choice worth less.

I need a new job for MANY reasons.


The closing performance of my show was its best. The audience was incredible, and the performers knew they made something wonderful. The show ultimately lost money, which is so disappointing I can't really talk about it, but the show was very good. I did my job well.

Should be flying to see the folks in NC this Thursday. I'll be in and out till then. Doesn't look like my gifts for them will be delivered in time. Ah well. We'll see how this visit goes, assuming it happens.

I'll be sunnier when I'm less menstrual.


As ever,
love to you...