allegro

Everything changed.

Yes, he found out.
Yes, I almost fell apart.
Yes, we're staying together.

But it helped me put the pieces together of years and years of self-destructive behavior. I've been forced to face my depression and anxiety and my enormous issues of self-esteem.

I want to stop hurting people. I always have.

Now I stop.


Love to you...

So far this week has been quite exciting, and that isn't a good thing. I've had the rug pulled out from under me twice in the same twenty hours hour period by the same people (some friends).

They managed to renew the source of my depression from October that I had finally kicked. Thanks ladies.
It's not as if I stopped being depressed, oh no....
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Happy arbitrary holiday y'all!

It was a fun and mostly low-key night out. My best friend from college announced that she got engaged. They are an incredibly excellent couple so I'm thrilled for her.

More news later. For now, I am off to a post-new year's breakfast!

Love to y'all.

I'm still here.

You'd hardly know, I know. I check the site 4-5 times a week but never have the time and energy to blog.

News Today:
Zot is okay!

Alright, you never knew he was at death's door, but trust me, on Tuesday my favorite cat in the world (not my cat, my boyfriend's) was just about past dead when my man rushed him...
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Y'all need new pictures. Hair got redone. It practically GLOWED.

Also, I wrote a fugue, but I don't know how to share that with you yet.
Still so friggin' busy. I can't WAIT to rediscover the meaning of free time, but that will wait for late January (or later).

Love to you.

It would appear I have been lying to you.

I have plenty of excuses. First the sound wouldn't record, then upon reinstalling the program the picture wouldn't work, then both worked and a recording was made but since half my RAM died, the computer would freeze every time I tried to upload. Now I have new RAM, but the video is now several weeks old...
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Good days.

For the past two days, doing good work has meant having lunch bought for me (on two different days, by two different people!).
Today I got the biggest paycheck I can ever remember getting. The best part of that it I get one just like it in two weeks. Then one two weeks after that.
It's not the biggest money in the world,...
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I just cashed my first paycheck in three months.

Life is so much better now.

I apologize that I haven't been around, by RL calls. With the death of my grandmother, family has descended on the house and I have loved the company of each and every one of them. Work started again with longer hours, which thankfully means much MUCH more pay. With my...
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My grandmother:

She was a concert pianist, an architect, a painter, and a writer. She traveled the whole world twice, spoke seven languages, and celebrated her 50th wedding anniversary a few years ago. Her name was Dulce; I called her Ibu (this apparently stems from the time she lived in Indonesia). She was smart as a whip.
She scared me plenty for awhile; she and...
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