Luke and I are a weird kind of on again off again together but not really together sort of thing. I know he loves me in his own way. He is a wonderful, beautiful person but he is extremely emotionally constipated. It requires a set of pliers and a drill to the teeth to ascertain what he is feeling at any given moment. I hate...
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Just managed to burn a pizza. D'oh! It was a homemade on too, well homemade in as much as I bought gluten free pizza bases and put the topping on myself. (Pancetta and tomato, as well as mozzarella and tomato paste and a wee bit of herbs.) The crust is burnt to a crisp but the middle is still edible. Idiot that I am I...
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I have had a niggling sore stomach for about two weeks now. Just under my ribs. It's not agony or anything, just niggling like I said. When I'm anxious my stomach gets very tense and when I eat my stomach tends to hurt for a while after. It can even be sore to the touch. I'll try and lie flat and rub my belly like...
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portrait_artist:
@alicerowena I hope it is just nerves and that You feel better soon.
It's time for some truth in this blog.
Luke and I didn't meet at work. We've never worked together. He does work in IT though and he's very good at it, as far as I'm aware. That at least is true. We have been to Aberdeen together, and eaten takeaway food together and he has also seen me naked.
We didn't have much of a...
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Not sure what I want to write about today. Usually I'll have something in my mind and I just let it go and see what happens. Today there's no big idea bubbled to the surface.
Virginia has been in my head for days. I have been spending most of my time with Khalilah lately so it's feels odd but nice to be back with her....
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I've been knitting today. I made a hat for my best friend. It took me absolutely ages to find the right wool and then another couple of false starts to get the right pattern. Normally I'm a crocheter but I couldn't find a pattern I liked so I found a knitted one I liked. I'm not nearly as good at knitting as I am at...
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It was good to be back at school I suppose. At least it was familiar. I had decent enough friends there. My best friend was Gillian. She had dark hair and permanently rosy cheeks and a quiet strength. You wouldn't mess with her. There were plenty of hard girls at my school and Gillian fitted in pretty well with them but she was different from...
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portrait_artist:
@alicerowena Enjoyable piece of writing. Chopin's Nocturnes is my favorite piece of music to listen to when I have to write something, sometimes I listen to it over and over.
alicerowena:
@portrait_artist Hi Jeff :) Thank you. I don't know a lot about classical music, it's seems so vast and overwhelming a world that I don't know where to approach it from. I do really like Chopin too though. I love listening to classical piano.
Halfway through nanowrimo today and it's also my dad's birthday. I didn't even realise it was his birthday until my mum mentioned it in her constant stream of chat. We went for a walk in the rain with her dog earlier. He was so slick with water he looked like he'd been Brylcreemed and my hand came away gritty and hairy when I gave him...
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I have been like this since I was eighteen. I am forty five now. There is no reason to think I am ever going to change. I have no involvement with mental health services anymore. They gave me therapy and pills and sent me on my way. There's not much else they can do for me. I held on to hope for a long time,...
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Dad fell to bits after mum left. She really was the love of his life. When I started living with him at home again I took on a lot of the chores. Dad was drinking a lot. I understood that, I really did. But he wasn't the only one that was hurting. My family had been ripped apart and I still missed my mum even...
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