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Not sure what I want to write about today. Usually I'll have something in my mind and I just let it go and see what happens. Today there's no big idea bubbled to the surface.
Virginia has been in my head for days. I have been spending most of my time with Khalilah lately so it's feels odd but nice to be back with her....
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I've been knitting today. I made a hat for my best friend. It took me absolutely ages to find the right wool and then another couple of false starts to get the right pattern. Normally I'm a crocheter but I couldn't find a pattern I liked so I found a knitted one I liked. I'm not nearly as good at knitting as I am at...
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It was good to be back at school I suppose. At least it was familiar. I had decent enough friends there. My best friend was Gillian. She had dark hair and permanently rosy cheeks and a quiet strength. You wouldn't mess with her. There were plenty of hard girls at my school and Gillian fitted in pretty well with them but she was different from...
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portrait_artist:
@alicerowena Enjoyable piece of writing. Chopin's Nocturnes is my favorite piece of music to listen to when I have to write something, sometimes I listen to it over and over.
alicerowena:
@portrait_artist Hi Jeff :) Thank you. I don't know a lot about classical music, it's seems so vast and overwhelming a world that I don't know where to approach it from. I do really like Chopin too though. I love listening to classical piano.
Halfway through nanowrimo today and it's also my dad's birthday. I didn't even realise it was his birthday until my mum mentioned it in her constant stream of chat. We went for a walk in the rain with her dog earlier. He was so slick with water he looked like he'd been Brylcreemed and my hand came away gritty and hairy when I gave him...
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I have been like this since I was eighteen. I am forty five now. There is no reason to think I am ever going to change. I have no involvement with mental health services anymore. They gave me therapy and pills and sent me on my way. There's not much else they can do for me. I held on to hope for a long time,...
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Dad fell to bits after mum left. She really was the love of his life. When I started living with him at home again I took on a lot of the chores. Dad was drinking a lot. I understood that, I really did. But he wasn't the only one that was hurting. My family had been ripped apart and I still missed my mum even...
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The well was pretty dry yesterday and I didn't reach my word goal and I am now on my third day of a seemingly endless migraine. It was pretty bad this morning, enough to make me cry out in pain. I took a fist full of ibuprofen and it seems to be helping. I have actual migraine medication but it doesn't really help. So here...
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When you can hardly leave the house, you have no friends, you live with your mother who you tread on eggshells around, you are cripplingly depressed, it takes you all night to go to bed because of these crazy rituals you've suddenly found yourself doing, and worst of all, the internet hasn't been invented yet you have to look elsewhere for solace.
I turned inwards....
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I watched two episodes of The Queen's Gambit and one one Riverdale. That's a lot of tv for me in one day. When I look back at what I've done in one day the answer is usually very little. but my day usually feels like I have been kept busy and my time has been well spent. That's because I've spent it lost in my...
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firefox:
I’ve watched all of the queens gambit and really enjoyed it
Everyone has been talking about how good The Queen's Gambit is on Netflix, so I just watched the first episode. It lived up to the hype and I'm looking forward to watching the rest. An old boyfriend (the one Mark was wildly jealous of) taught me to play chess years ago, but we only played a few times so it never really stuck. I've forgotten...
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Another extremely grey and wet day in Pingley. It is getting dark already and it's only four o'clock. My period just started. When I got in from my walk yesterday there was a huge hoverfly on my livingroom window. It hung around there for ages. Dante wasn't bothered, usually he leaps to attack any winged creature that dares encroach on his territory. It sat on...
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portrait_artist:
I'm Jeff. I notice insects too, sometimes I hallucinate that a particular insect has a kind of significance, but usually not. There are silverfish in my apartment, and I am making a study of them. Some days I squish them and other days I don't. You had lot of mercy on the hoverfly, while at the same time wishing the cat would get it.
portrait_artist:
All of us are filled with contradictions like that.
I played piano for a little while this afternoon. Erik Satie's Gnossiennes. Sparse, jerky, sad pieces of music. They fit the autumnal day. It has been foggy for days. The park opposite our limestone townhouse is empty, except for occasional dog walkers. Wet leaves lie in the gutter. I like days like this. It's comfortably sad and rich in atmosphere. Potent with drowsy possibilities.
James,...
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