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alia666

The Haute, Indiana

Member Since 2003

Followers 47 Following 22

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Friday Jun 13, 2003

Jun 13, 2003
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God, I'm so tired. I think a lot of it has got to be emotional exhaustion. I've been trying like hell for over a month now for a job and gotten jack shit. I have to pay rent. My best friend Dave82 has been helping out and even lent me money for rent last month, but I hate doing that to him, as sweet as he is. And my roommates don't seem to realize that I am in fact trying hard, and everyone's more and more pissed every single day that I don't have a job. I can be pretty stoic sometimes, I know that. I prefer to keep things that are bothering me or whatever, really most of the details of my life, to myself. But that doesn't mean that I don't stress and worry about things. And I think that maybe my stoicism has led them to think that I don't really care, which couldn't be further from the truth. Ugh.

Not a helluvalot going on. Got some massage oil and have been working on peoples' backs. Sam told me that I ought to get paid for it. Hmm. I doubt that would get me regular money for things like rent and groceries and such though. Blah. I feel like a cup of ick.
VIEW 6 of 6 COMMENTS
tadzi:
i know what you mean. my stoicism (and my shyness) leads a lot of people to think im arrogant
Jun 13, 2003
gotham2:
i'm the same way (being stoic and whatnot), and have been in a similar situation. it started looking like i was never gonna find a job, and that i'd have to become a hired assassin or a stripper or something, but after a couple months i found a decent one and payed off all my debts. it'll happen, usually when you least expect it.

if Sam has an issue with the pics thing maybe you just need to really talk about it seriously with him, in regards to your reasons, his concerns, etc. hope it all works out for you soon.
Jun 13, 2003

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