alhim

sex education is so amusing.

Cunnilingus Techniques and Secrets

The best part of sex, in my far-from-humble opinion, is the pleasure you can cause in your partner(s).
While being stimulated by your partner is certainly far better (for most people, if their partner's any good at
it) than masturbation, it is still pretty much the same, only better.
Going down on a lover, on the other hand, allows you to get a kind of pleasure that you cannot give yourself, even
in part; the vicarious or empathic response you get from their reactions.
The techniques here, therefore, are centered around cunnilingus, including (since there's no separate name) using
your fingers. Along a similar line I've now written Advanced Fellatio Techniques and Secrets. This was learned
as a subject, not performer, but with the same quality of skill involved. Because of the number of questions I
received on the subject, I also have Advanced Anal Sex Techniques, for those who want to know about that.

Basic Guidelines:
"Less" is always the best way to start out if you don't know exactly what a specific person likes. It's
much safer to build up from "not enough" than to try to back down after shattering the mood by being too
rough. The final argument to ensure that you always apply this rule is this -- If you start out "too"
gentle/slowly, in most cases this just excites your lover more, even in the rare cases that it frustrates her
a little. But if you start out "too" rough for her, it almost always turns her off to the whole thing.
The differences between women cannot be emphasized enough -- no matter what you have
encountered so far, always assume that you have no idea what a new partner enjoys. It is entirely
possible to have had many lovers, and think
They are all pretty much the same or
You've learned all of the variations, and can tell who's what.
But this can be (and usually is) just a matter of random chance...you happened to get several similar lovers.
Eventually you will run into someone, or many people, who are completely different than those you've
known before.
Don't start by going down on her. Work your way up to it. Exceptions may be if you're in a hurry
before your Press Secretary shows up, or other situations where you're expected to act more directly.
It's worth observing that "work your way up to it" remains true no matter how many times you've been
with that lover. With a long-term lover it may seem like you can get right to the direct stuff, but working
your way up still has the same effect of increasing her excitement, with most women.
Along the same line of reasoning, don't start licking her clitoris immediately, when you do get there.
Start with the area around it, which can be pretty sensitive with some women, even if it doesn't seem to
cause the same dramatic response.
Even more important is to not immediately start inserting fingers in her vagina. With most women, that
really needs to be built up, first. It usually doesn't hurt to build up a little, even if she's already excited.
Remember this -- Most often, the tongue works best with the clitoris, the fingers with the vagina/g-spot.
Someone else's fingers on her clitoris tends to be a little rough, no matter how careful they are...and
almost all of the excitement she gets from attempting to lick into her vagina is psychological; she can't
really feel much that way.
Hand Care It's best to be sure your fingernail edges are very smooth, and preferably cut all the way
down to where they connect to your skin. No matter how careful you are, they are likely to cause her to
get a little sore inside, or even really hurt, feeling like a knife cutting her. This can even be the cause of
soreness that she doesn't realize is being caused by your nails. Being a guitarist, I have the nails on my
left hand trimmed back as far as I can cut them, anyway. Guitar also gives one's fret-hand amazing
endurance and finesse, for g-spot stimulation and other tricks.
Dental Dams These are, in most cases, just plain silly. Unlike almost any other form of sexual activity,
the odds of you transmitting or catching AIDS this way are almost zero. There are almost no cases of any
female homosexuals, for instance, even /claiming/ to have caught AIDS this way. In case you're wondering
what the hell I'm talking about, a "dental dam" is simply a condom cut in half lengthwise and used to keep
fluids from passing between mouth and vulva. And it's being advocated primarily by people who are simply
jealous that they're missing out on a great chance to be a "victim" in the issue of sexually transmitted
diseases.

Interesting note -- A little noise on your part usually doesn't hurt, and sometimes it helps. Some women are very
hung up on cunnilingus, determined to believe that, no matter how much you say otherwise (and she claims to
believe you), it may be at least a little unpleasant for you. If you're excited by her responses, or by the act
itself, don't try to stay quiet about it. The same kind of sounds that will reassure and excite a lover when
they're pleasuring you will often work when you're pleasuring them, too. This could be considered a secret
weapon in sex in general, because most guys are rather quiet, and yet women almost always find responsiveness
very exciting. The contrast between someone who's responsive and most of the other guys makes it even more
effective than it would already have been.

More Advanced Techniques:
The G-Spot
This does exist. And in over half of the women out there, it works better than anything else you can do to cause
a strong, prolonged orgasm. The original name is the Grafenberg spot, after a doctor, Earnest Grafenberg, who
documented the area (which may have been known by people here and there throughout history) in the fifties.
This "spot" is a small "mound" of tissue inside the vagina, between a penny and quarter in size, which responds to
being pressed upon. It's almost certainly not the skenes glands, (which are located around the urethra, which is
behind the G-spot area), as has been suggested by a few people. In fact, the G-Spot is the tissue in that raised
area of the vagina, which has a higher concentration of sexual nerves, and produces hormones similar to those
made by the male's prostate gland.
A sort of map to the area -- Imagine your lover lying on her back, legs spread. Your position is between her legs.
You would slide a finger inside her vagina, palm up. With your finger straight back, middle finger is best, you
would curve it toward yourself, gently, as if you were gesturing to someone to "come here". In doing so, the area
you press on should be pretty near her "G-Spot" area. If you know enough to follow the urethra (the tube that
leads from the bladder to where the pee comes out), along the inside of her vagina, you may feel a slight swelling
(if she's excited) at the point where the g-spot is.
She must be excited, especially if either you or she is new to the g-spot, for the g-spot to have any real effect
at all. It's not the ideal area for getting your lover aroused.
But when she is excited, this area (more often than not) is the best way to bring her to orgasm. You work your
way back to it gradually, teasing her (typically, this works best) with your fingers, slowly and gently. It's easier
to hit the right area with two fingers, but this may not be comfortable for her, depending on how "tight" she is
at that moment. When you have your fingers around the right area, try gently pressing, not too quickly. The
movement should be fairly rhythmic. It's typically best if you're licking her clitoris (or near it, depending on
the woman) at the same time...don't make a big deal out of the "quest", this will often make her feel
self-conscious, or distracted. The licking should seem to be the primary activity.
When you find the right area, she should respond by getting more excited. Most of the vagina's inside surface
isn't really that sexually sensitive, believe it or not...most of the excitement of randomly inserting fingers is
more psychological than from the actual stimulation.
While more complicated techniques work with some women, some of the time, the best basic technique, upon
finding the g-spot, is to continue to slowly, rhythmically press on it, while licking her clitoris (for a few women,
the labia (lips) are sensitive to licking, too).
This should cause her to build up to an orgasm.
A G-Spot orgasm is different (always, when it works at all) than any other kind women have. It is possible, with
some women, to have different qualities and kinds of orgasms from vaginal, clitoral, anal, and even breast
stimulation...but with other women, those kinds of orgasms are all pretty much the same. But the G-Spot orgasm
not only feels different; it also causes her body to react in a different way.
First, it often causes a "push out" orgasm. The area around, or "above" (farther inside, that is) your fingers
seems to swell up or to contract toward the opening of her vagina.
If you find the right combination of pushing back when this happens, and slacking off to let it push out, you can
cause (in perhaps half of the women) her orgasm to continue happening, long after normal ones would have
subsided. In some women you can even keep her at a "plateau" (raised level) of sexual excitement, like a
prolonged orgasm (or a little less than one) afterward, building up to an even bigger climax. I've managed to
keep this pattern of build-up, orgasm, plateau, orgasm, build-up, orgasm for over four hours, with one lover. We
stopped when, though she wanted to go on, she was so exhausted that she really had to stop.
That brings me to another important point; G-Spot orgasms sometimes (less than half of the women, I'd guess,
and in some of those women only occasionally) causes a huge amount (relatively speaking) of lubrication (juices,
wetness)...far more than even the most excited woman gets from "conventional" stimulation. It's a good thing, too,
because otherwise g-spot orgasms can only be prolonged for as long as she does not get raw/sore from it...which
is yet another reason to be gentle.
When that extra wetness combines with the push-out orgasm, you get actual ejaculation...like a guy, but much
better tasting. The built up juices can shoot out in such volume that you, or she, may be afraid that she lost
control of her bladder. That is (almost always) not what happened. The fear that she peed can be enhanced by
the fact that the urethra is behind the g-spot, so that in rare cases the woman can sometimes get the feeling that
she needs to pee, even though she does not.
In reality, in both men and women, enough sexual excitement prevents peeing, unless you try really hard. This is a
built-in reflex, because urine is something of a spermicide. The "pee hard-on" that men get in the morning is
partially his body taking advantage of this reflex, to keep him from accidentally wetting the bed with the urine
that built up while he was sleeping.


Licking the Alphabet
Believe it or not, Sam Kinnison's suggestion of licking the alphabet, one letter at a time, on and around her
clitoris/vulva actually works. I had come up with a similar technique myself, but his version is pretty close to
the perfect formula -- The real goal is to be able to keep regular, rhythmic motions going, but to change them in
some gradual pattern that isn't so different it throws her off, but isn't so redundant that she grows insensitive
to it. The alphabet is probably the longest chain of shapes that you can be sure to repeat smoothly and
rhythmically, without loosing track of where you are. Unless you are a victim of public education, I suppose, in
which case you may have to stick to the letters of your name, or the numbers one through nine (being too
confused by where to put the zero).
I would not suggest combining this with the g-spot stimulation, at least not with the intention of really giving her
g-spot orgasms. The two techniques conflict a bit, as the focus of arousal is so different.

Cough Drops - Nothing to Sneeze At
After you've thought about it for a while, this will seem obvious. Just remember that it probably wasn't, until a
minute ago...
The way a cough drop, either menthol or mint, works is to stimulate the mucus membranes in your mouth in the
special way that feels "cool and tingly". Well, one of the few other places (easily accessible) on the human body
that has mucus membranes is the vaginal area. Many people find that, correctly applied, a cough drop feels just
spectacular down there. Most people at least find it a very...ah...refreshing change of pace.

A few important tips:
Use sugar-free cough drops. N'ice is a great brand, especially the menthol or mint versions. If possible,
find one (whatever brand) with both menthol and mint. It's actually possible that sugar cough drops are
just fine, or even better...the debate is over whether the sugar might feed an already existing yeast
infection. The things I've heard from semi-expert (medically) people are that it may feed one (and thus
aggrevate it), that it actually will protect from yeast infection (I forget the reasoning, it may have been
a Ph thing), or that it's not the kind of yeast that eats sugar anyway. One thing's unanimous: sugar cough
drops won't make any difference unless you're already infected, they don't carry that kind of yeast. In
fact, a human's fingers or tongue would be more likely to (and even that is pretty unlikely, if they're of
even typical cleanliness).
Let the drop become even more rounded and smoothed by sucking on it for a while, if you're actually
going to apply it inside (which is the most effective way).
Speaking of which, the best thing to do is actually insert it with your fingers. This only works if you're
going to be using your fingers during the cunnilingus, though an alternative is to leave it there for a
while and then engage in coitus, which can be pretty nifty for both parties.
If not insertion, the best way is to simply suck on it and then, with cough-droppy saliva, lick her as you
would have done anyway,perhaps using the Alphabet method. This isn't quite as amazing, but is still
pretty good.
Altoids are supposed to be pretty good, but they're very powerful. I haven't yet verified whether they
work, though Don & Mike (Radio Gods) unintentionally made a big deal of it recently. They admitted
they were working from a position of ignorance, much like their reviews of movies they have never seen.
Don't forget to try breathing on, or blowing lightly on, her vagina/clitoris. The effect is more subtle
until you try this... it's the exposure to air that makes it especially tingly.

Just for Noel
When Christmas time rolls around, some stores sell a kind of candy cane that's over an inch thick and six or eight
inches long at the straight part (it may not even have the hooked part at all).
Take one end of that, and suck/lick it until it is more rounded and smooth, and you have one of the most
entertaining objects you might ever insert in your lover's vagina. It has that special minty feeling, like a cough
drop but milder, and is the approximate size/shape of a penis.

Butt-Free Anal Stimulation
I like making up titles.
The vagina actually shares a wall, on one side, with the rectum. Not only does this mean that sexual stimulation is
possible from anal entry (which is a whole separate page), it also means that a similar sensation can be acheived
without ever touching her butt (not that there's anything wrong with that...heh) by stimulating the side of her
vagina where it shares nerves with her rectum. This is more or less the exact opposite, one hundred eighty
degrees around, from the g-spot. In other words, if you were to reach in and arch your finger to touch her
g-spot, then rotate your hand to face the exact other direction and make a similar (but flatter) motion, you've
got the right area. Common sense should tell you where I'm talking about, anyway, since it's the area where it
would touch her rectum, inside.
It rarely works well to stimulate this early on...usually you need to not only build up to it, but even get her
pretty excited and sensitive first. This is not only to make the area more receptive, but also, in some cases, so
that she will be beyond any danger of distraction over the tabooness of how it feels somewhat like you're
stimulating her anally.
Press more with the length of your finger, not the tip. This works best, in many cases, as a change of pace, not
the main attraction. Which leads us to...

Around the World -- or the Sea, Anyway
Once you have your lover "used to" the whole g-spot stimulation thing (she will actually get "better at" cumming
from g-spot stimulation, the more it's done to her), you can try, occasionally and for variety, stimulating her
g-spot until she starts to really respond, then switching back and forth between pushing (as gently as normally
necessary for that particular lover) her g-spot and pressing the length of your finger on the opposite side, as
per the last section. Sometimes you can even get to the point of doing one press on one side, one on the other,
back and forth, which can feel amazing and a bit "what on earth are you doing? No, I didn't say to stop" to her.
Most likely, though, it'll work better if you switch every several seconds, not every time you press.

Around the World -- Part II
I should not fail to mention the cervix. You may not have even noticed it, by touch, but it's there and once you
find it you'll wonder how you missed it (unless your lover has had hysterectomy, in which case it's missing, no big
deal). This is yet another area where you definitely want to build up to stimulating, as it can actually be painful
to even touch if she's not excited enough...but, despite assumptions to the contrary, it can be very useful for
stimulation, done correctly.
As I said, issue #1 is that she must be very aroused. Well, bearing in mind that everyone's different, of course.
The Cervix is also about 180 degrees around from the g-spot, but it's in much deeper (typically). It leads back
to the rest of her reproductive organs, like the womb. If she's pregnant, don't mess with this at all. Watch out,
too, for IUDs and diaphrams and the like. Hopefully you are on good enough terms with her to already know if
she's using one of these contraceptive devices, which fit over the cervix.
The cervix is not an abtract "area", it actually juts up, like a little flesh mesa or something. It has an opening at
its very "peak", but this is normally closed pretty tightly.
The best way to start is to gently caress around the sides and base of the cervix. Remember, she should already
be very "hot" before you even start this part. Eventually, build up to circling it with one or two fingers, around
and around, gently staying in contact with it so she can feel the motion through the cervix itself. How hard you
can press depends a lot on the specific woman. This is also something that probably works better as a change of
pace, not the "main course" of the cunnilingus session...unless she really gets into it.
That circling motion may get another round of "what on earth are you doing...hey! Don't STOP doing it!".
You may even, and in my experience this rarely works, but works well when it does, be able to press directly on
the tip, with your finger or fingers, pressing it the way a penis might if one happened be entering her at the
right angle to hit her cervix.

Actual Anal Stimulation
This works very well with cunnilingus, if the woman is comfortable with it. In fact, it has its own section on the
Advanced Anal Sex Techniques page...I won't go into any real detail here but to point you to that page.
Comments/Appendices:

Taste
Anyone who likes, say, coffee or beer should have no room to complain about the way most women taste.
No, I don't mean it tastes like coffee or beer, genius...I mean that beer and coffee are, at best, acquired
tastes...they are not naturally pleasant to a human being, no matter how much your addiction to one or both
has convinced you otherwise. Most people, whether they remember it or not, had to learn to like the taste
of beer/coffee, and had the desire to be Like the Adults to help them along. Well, I'd list taking pleasure
in cunnilingus above drinking addictive beverages on the list of things that prove maturity. Aside from
that, there's the fact that many people who give it an honest try genuinely enjoy the taste/smell, myself
included. Had I not liked it, for some reason, I would have simply taught myself to like it, because of the
great pleasure it can bring. Aside from whether you find the taste/smell sexually exciting to begin with
(and, because of pheromones, males (at least) should), surely it will become ever more stimulating for you
as you come to associate it with the pleasure you can give.

Rest
If you do have a lover who can experience repeated, extended orgasms from g-spot stimulation, and you
(for some reason) need to take a break, the absolute best way to do this is to give her a clitoral orgasm.
This can be as simple as pushing even more gently and slowly on her g-spot, while giving her clitoris more
attention (it can often take more direct and firm stimulation by that level of arousal), so that her next
orgasm is really caused by the licking, not the pressing of your finger(s). This works because, with many
women anyway, clitoral orgasms leave her feeling very sensitive, and momentarily satisfied (or at least
wanting to take a breather).
There is, on the other hand, a very interesting trick for staying "in the game" when your tongue is getting
tired. Switch from moving your tongue directly, to using your whole jaw to move your tongue, by slightly
opening and closing it. If you tire of this, move your entire head, so that it's doing the actual work that
makes your tongue move. When even your neck tires, it's on to the final backup-plan, but the one that
works the longest; gently rock your entire body back and forth, at the same speed that you were doing
each of the other, so that it's your body that's actually doing the work to move your tongue. For someone
who hasn't built up the mighty endurance that's useful with a lover who can have hours of orgasms, this is
a great trick. Of course it mainly works when you're going simpler, rhythmic motions...save the fancy
tongue stuff for when your tongue's doing all of the work (you should be able to switch back to
tongue-only motion regularly, as it gets rested).

____________________________________________


Part One
Introduction
Sex is a wonderful thing - I haven't met a person yet who would dispute this.
Everybody loves sex, whether they like talking about it openly or not.
One of the reasons you're reading this is because you enjoy sex and you would like
to enjoy it more and have your partner enjoy it more.
For all you males reading this, wouldn't you like to be known around town as the greatest fuck of all time?
Or husbands and men in steady relationship - wouldn't you like your woman to be amazed at your new found sexual
knowledge and have her beg you for more sex? Sex can be the greatest pleasure a person can ever experience - or a major disappointment.
Surveys have shown that 75% of women fake orgasm every time, 15% faked it most of the time and about 9.5% said they occasionally faked it.
Which leaves about 0.5% who said they never faked it.
I know most of you men out there will find this hard to believe, but it's true. I'm a woman, I know.

Women, by faking orgasms, are missing out on one of the most pleasurable experiences imagineable - but so are their partners.
You will realize the difference once you have read this Playgal exclusive article.
Both the male and females sexual pleasure increases to unbelievable new heights once you know how to bring a woman to an orgasm every time.
Your woman will want you as never before - she will never want or need another man.
And girls, if you want to have better sex, then teach your man what I am about to tell you.

Most men I have met were anxious to learn how to satisfy women during sex.
Each man I interviewed I asked 'What do you think makes a woman orgasm most during intercourse?' Most responses were along the lines of:

'Just putting my penis inside her gets her excited' - It may get your partner excited but it is not enough - no where near enough.
'She just loves me ramming her hard' - This is so far from the truth it is ridiculous!
'Fucking her fast' - Wrong!

It is generally easy for men to become sexually aroused because his sexual organs are on the outside of the body and are easily stimulated.
Men that are unfit mentally or physically can sometimes take longer to arouse,
as do men that are bored with their partners.
Do you know the main reason men get bored with their partners sexually?
Could it be that the woman herself is bored because she is not getting sexual pleasure and therefore doesn't seem interested in sex as much.
Sex would get boring if the pleasure is all one sided, don't you think guys? I
magine having sex every few days and never reaching an orgasm. Doesn't sound like much fun does it?

Some men can get a woman worked into a sexual frenzy during foreplay, but then when it comes to intercourse ..
the momentum doesn't continue and in most cases, both the man and woman don't know what is wrong.

Then the woman finally pretends to have an orgasm because she wants the whole event to be over to end the boredom and/or pain.

If a man doesn't know how to handle intercourse properly the woman will become bored and unsatisfied in the relationship, and look for other options.
Most women will tell their men everything is great - just to keep them feeling like a man.
The men usually are unsuspecting that there is a problem.

But guys, it's not your fault - you're a man; how could you possibly know what it feels like?
Only a woman really knows how to satisfy a woman. Only a woman knows the physical sensations of a woman's body.
Most women don't like talking about it with their partners because it may make them feel less manly.
Most literature is written about rough, ramming and hard sex, so why would anyone think sex should be different -
most women think this is the way to have sex too.
But I'm going to help you and your partner enjoy sex to its maximum over the next few editions of Playgal.














Tease your Partner First
Women like affection. They like to have their bodies gently caressed.
Imagine yourself lying totally naked and 100% relaxed with hands slowly and gently touching your body. Try running your fingertips gently,
so gentle you are barely touching your body along the inside of your own arm down to your hand.
It tickles a bit but it feels nice, even if it feels like you need to scratch it a little.

When making love with your partner you need to give their body a desire.
Gently run your fingertips all over her body barely touching the skin. Do this for 3-4 minutes without touching the breasts or clitoris
then slowly work your way up to her breasts but DONT touch her nipples. Circle her breasts with the palms of your hands and fingertips.
You can occasionally kiss gently around her breasts but DON'T touch her nipples yet - touch below and above them but not on them.

This will start to drive her crazy - you have created a desire for you to touch her nipples.
You are not giving her something she wants. After a few minutes of teasing her very very softly touch her nipples.
Then continue to circle the nipples gently with your fingers then gently lick once or twice next to each nipple but not on it.

You are in total control - she is being driven insane by now.
You have created an excitement and desire within her sexual being.
Now when you feel she is ready - she will let you know it is time to move on to the next step .. The beginning of Intercourse, in PART 2, next month.
Note to Part 1:
It is important not to weaken and begin to grope and paw at her breasts and body and do not touch her clitoris in this teasing phase - it will only turn her off.
The purpose is to create a want. Don't weaken - stay in control, this is only the warm-up for great love making.




Part Two
Ready for Action!
Now, you're both ready to go .. you're hard and ready, and she's giving you that look that says she wants it.
You just want to plunge straight in - and she's cheering you on.
DON'T DO IT!

You haven't gone to all this effort to blow it all now, pardon the pun.
Now - you've got to really start torturing her..

Touch your penis to the lips of her clitoris .. gently.
Softly rub your penis over her clit, letting her know it's there, ready to enter .. if you want it to.
You are now completely in charge, and in total control of the situation.
You're going to tease her until she screams for you to put it in!

Now, she's asking you to put it in .. but you don't. Keep teasing. She asks more urgently .. you still don't.
You are in control, and she's loving it - not knowing when you're going to enter! Keep teasing, gently rubbing, even if she does scream for you to put it in.

Only when she begins building towards orgasm to you move it further in .. just half an inch or so, very slowly, in and out.
After a little while (staying in control!) move it slowly in a full inch .. gradually, keep increasing the amount you put it in, until it's almost the whole length.

Remember, if you enter the entire length - ram it in - you will make contact with her clit, and this we don't want; the object is to tease her,
make her want you to thrust all the way. The longer you tease her, and yourself, the more intense your orgasms will be.

The Point of Surrender
Now, she's quivering with desire. Speed up a little - not to ramming speed though - and it'll push her over the edge.
She may scream, she may call at your name (hopefully!) or she may just whimper softly - but you'll know you've given her an orgasm.
But keep going! Keep moving in and out, faster now; she'll orgasm again - more quickly now, with no need for teasing.
You can speed up even more if you wish (and can) - but don't resort to 'ramming' her hard.

She may have several more orgasms .. or only one more.
Two to five is the norm, and this may be the first one she's had in a long time!
If you've been able to keep going past the first one, that's great .. but even if you cum now,
it will be one of the deepest and most incredible orgasms you yourself have ever had.

Refine your technique; try to make yourself hold off longer and longer. It will enrich the sexual experience for both you and your partner.

Note to Part 2:
If you're both adventurous - and really willing to torture each other, wait until the point of orgasm and stop - dead.
Withdraw, and lie down beside her.. then resume again later that or the next day.
The anticipation will peak, until the next time you'll both be ready with hardly any teasing!







Part Three
The Fantasy!
Most of us, when it comes to sex, have a good imagination.
We might fantasise about the woman who works in the office next door, someone who eats lunch at the same place we do,
or even imagine ourselves playing out different roles that we usually perform.
So - why not harness this natural power of fantasization for sex? If you're more excited and aroused, your partner will know it and go further herself.
And, as long as she doesn't know what you're thinking, you can imagine anything.

There are those, both men and women, who like to imagine themselves dominating their partner, or being submissive.
This is perfectly harmless as long as it goes no further than the mind - or, if it does go further,
with a partner who is attracted to the idea and wants to play out the other role.

And don't let appearances fool you .. a sedate appearing person may have some very kinky thoughts bubbling under the surface;
in fact, if a person is more self-repressed, it's more likely they'll be making up for it in their minds.

.. vs. Reality
You, and your partner, both probably have many secret little fantasies that you've always wanted to try.
Although dressing up as King Tutankahmen and having your lover wait on you hand and foot may not be something you can confide in with someone you've just met,
you can imagine yourself in that position .. and, when you reach a stage with someone where you feel you can trust each other,
let her know about this litle fantasy .. and encourage her to tell you her own.

If you do become open to each other's fantasies, it's important that you don't let them take over .. or you may find yourself resorting to kinkier
and kinkier role-playing, until one day, you stop yourself and say 'Whoah! This is getting scary .. I'm getting out!'

It's important to realise that although fantasies - and role playing - are a great adjunct to 'normal' sexual encounters, they can't replace them .. and,
the more you indulge in fantasies to spice up your sex life, the more you will come to rely on them.

Strike a balance - use the anticipation of an upcoming role-playing 'session' to fuel your desire; and maybe even run the fantasy through your mind until
you can both no longer resist. In this way, you can get the most 'mileage' out of your imaginations.

Part Four
Healthy Body - Great Sex!
One of the biggest factors affecting the enjoyment of sex is the health of the body.
Smoking cigarettes constricts the capillaries and blood vessels in the body, which restricts blood flow to the genitals and thus decreases sexual enjoyment;
alcohol and other caffeine sources destroy vital vitamin B elemnts within the body, making us more lethargic.

This lethargy and lack of physical vitality not only communicates itself to our partner during sex,
but also comes across when we're on the look-out for a partner; it's ironic that the two most consumed items in a bar or night-club environment - alcohol and cigarettes
- are the two greatest killers of good sex! Vitamin B, which is burnt up by the metabolising of alcohol,
also makes us more relaxed - so while the alcohol is loosening us up on the one hand, it's destroying our Vitamin B levels.
so when the alcohol has been metabolised from our bodies, we are VERY low on Vitamin B - and thus the hangover.

Our bodies function best when they contain optimum levels of amino acids, nutrients and other chemicals required for the chemical lab we call a body.
Unfortunately, modern lifestyles generally do not allow for the proper intake of such chemicals; and so, the majority of the population is functioning improperly.
So, YOU can stand out from the crowd by simply being healthier; you'll project an aura of energy and vitality that will make you feel great - and if you feel great,
other people feel great about you.
Getting Healthier
More and more vitamins and other nutrients, and how they power our body, are being discovered every year. But the basics are:
Vitamin A: essential for good skin; gets rid of those pimples and other skin impurities. It improves you hair condition, and helps your vision, both night and day.

Vitamin B: actually a broad spectrum of Vitamins, including B1, B2, B6, B12, folic acid, niacin, inositol and pantothenic acid, among others.
They are what's called synergistic, meaning that if you take too much of one type, it can make you deficient in the others; so you should take a B complex supplement
every day (because B groups are water soluble, they must be replenished every day)

Vitamin C: Or ascorbic acid, assists the immune system. It should be taken with a lot of liquid. If you keep your doses high in this (say, 10,000 mgs a day)
you're likely to reduce your risk of catching colds and flus.

Vitamin D: Also gotten from exposure to the sun, it helps the body to absorb and retain calcium. Vitamin D in itself needs fat or oils to be absorbed,
so take it after a meal that includes some.

Vitamin E: Assists in the transport and efficient use of oxygen; more oxygen gets to your cells, particularly your brain.
It's also called the 'sex vitamin' because it assists in the production of sex hormones.
These are the basic vitamins; however, one indespensible way to a healthy body has to be at least a minimum amount of exercise.
Even if you work out lightly for half an hour every day or two, your body will function more efficiently, the blood circulate better,
and your whole body function better with less stress.P And of course, let's not forget the best form of exercise - sex!